It’s been a while since I reported on the royals. Probably because Kate can do no wrong and Wills is doing his best, bless him.
But sources tell me that the PoW is side-lining his rapacious brother whose strings are obviously still being jerked by the inimitable Fergie. Andy’s been whining about his daughters’ having to work for living – which they seem do do but rather spasmodically – arguing that the Heir’s lads are fully subsidised royals. With his nose well and truly out of joint, Andy asked HM the Queen to intercede on his behalf – and got what can only be described as the bum’s rush from the Palace too.
Come on girls! Use your natural talents, tap into Daddy’s well-oiled connections, marry well – and Chuck’s your uncle!
Now don’t get me wrong, I’m as francophile as the next man. M. Hulot is a hero, Bardot an icon, Paris the real deal. But like so many good things France is badly served by its people when the chips are down.
Remember Charles Le Nez? He’s the fella who decamped to London when les Boches invaded and returned home when the last shots had been fired, declaring he was the saviour of France. But he was the only European who believed it.
And now, when France faces a formidable force of British brains in the Battle of Brexit, what do les Froches do? They puff themselves up and bring out their most horrifying weapon, so often deployed against British tourists: Non speakee Eenglish.
It’s just the French way. Such self-belief! So divorced from reality! You have to admire them – or do you?
The Clinton Trump face-off is raising questions about what is acceptable behaviour from a wannabe Commander-in-Chief.
Trump’s life in business and the media is being exposed in all its unethical banality. Hillary is on the pillory (!) for alleged illegalities and deceptions over the years.
And now (remember both candidates are of retirement age) Trump suggests Clinton is boosted by performance-enhancing drugs. As if this is a quasi-athletic contest in which a level-playing-field must be guaranteed. So – is it? Do the most senior public servants have a duty to be subject to medical scrutiny and be ‘clean’? If so does such a prerequisite apply similarly to their staff; and their staff, etc?
So come to think of it, should Churchill and JFK have been disqualified from office? Is today’s political environment different?
That is the SNP’s new slogan. A world where men in skirts play their pipes untroubled by the cruel realities of GDP, the national debt, the cost of welfare and the absence of the Great Scotch Free Lunch.
And the Caviar Queen, unable to look over the towering Hadrian’s Wall – owing to her myopia amongst other little problems – has no doubt about the appeal of a future already mapped out by Greece. Except the crumbling EU will no longer throw good money after bad.
So one must as an Englander wish her well with her dream, removing from the rest of the UK the Great Caledonian Burden. Give her a new vote to defect, help her to win it, cast her adrift and breathe a sigh of relief.
What is the EU’s strategy for dealing with Brexit – if it has one?
Are confrontation and slander likely to achieve more than diplomacy?
Juncker accuses the UK of 40 years of lying and racism.
Does he hope Ms May will respond with Farage-like jibes?
Le petit Nicolas schemes his way back to the top, despite his criminal cases. Will he be given another chance? Will it make any difference to France’s failing fortunes and Europe’s little local difficulties? Probably not, mes amis.
Thomas Toad spends most days snuggled beneath the bay plant, looking smug
after a puffed-up encounter with his metre-long rival, Black Adder.
It’s a beech hedge, 70 yards long on our southern boundary. Can’t hold the electric trimmer at shoulder level for a couple of hours so it’s the shears! Do they make a battery job that doesn’t need recharging every half hour?
It’s now official, God help us. These two should be on Comedy Central and not C-Span.
Hill Liar: Compulsive liar. All the big lies are in the public domain but there’s a lot of little ones as well lurking in the atmosphere. It was the late Christopher Hitchens that wrote about the meeting of the two famous Hillarys in Asia in 1985. Mrs Clinton claimed she was named after the mountaineer. It was only later that the truth came out. Clinton was born in 1947, six years before Edmund scaled the summit. All those lies, big and small, have led HC to touching distance of the ultimate peak.
Vladimirump: Compulsive thief. Anne Applebaum and the chess expert turned astute political analyst, Garry Kasparov are just two to have written that Trump is a pawn of Putin. It is a big story in Washington at the moment. Donald’s extensive business interests in the Motherland are reason enough for him to not go to war if Russia invades the Baltics. For Commander in Chief Trump the NATO pact is not worth a rouble. Luckily for Donald there is no HUAC to grill him about his Siberian links only an Azeri Grandmaster.
With the choice being between Scylla and Charybdis expect a low turn out on polling day as voters won’t know where to turn. As Kissinger said “It’s a pity they can’t both lose.” Maybe, they can. Is there an honest, hard-working, clean-cut, intelligent Independent candidate out there that could upset the apple cart? Could the 45th POTUS be a dark horse elected by tactical voting?