This is quite enough.

Germany is a highly regulated country. No one has ever denied that. In fact, many wry observations have been made concerning the level of bureaucracy and regulation in the Federal Republic. Not too long ago, a woman at my health insurance company told me a joke about Germany: “Germany, your bureaucrats”. Part of this is cultural. Germans tend to see things in black and white. Germans also tend to prefer said black and said white to be as clearly delineated as possible.
This is also reflected in the German legal system. Forms and contracts in Germany tend to be quite succinct, especially when compared to those written in Common Law countries. The German Civil Code is very detailed and covers virtually every aspect of commerce and legally binding agreements. There is little point in outlining terms and conditions because any agreement would be subject to established rules and regulations.
Today, however, I spotted something which simply went too far. It being a cool day, I found it necessary to go to a convenience. After paying my obligatory 50-cent fee, annoying but tolerable considering that in exchange the convenience is clean and well-maintained, I saw an illustrated guide to adhering to regulations concerning how men may use a toilet. Yes, there are now regulations concerning which position men can be in while using a toilet. I am not entirely sure how they intend to enforce these regulations, but they have illustrated guides showing how to obey these regulations. We men must sit when urinating, not stand. I wish them the very best of luck in their attempts to persuade men to comply with this.

New photo competition, ‘DETAIL’ – closing date UK midnight, 15th November

Evening all,

here is the next photo competition – with apologies for my tardy response.

Please post a photo which focusses on some detail we may usually overlook.

?????????? Continue reading “New photo competition, ‘DETAIL’ – closing date UK midnight, 15th November”

Living With Huns IV: the Hunnish Character

The Hun is a strange creature indeed. The stray example abroad might prove to be amusing, if not quite charming. This charm, however, rarely extends to the invasive hordes seen in parts of Spain and Italy in August. Observed in their native habitat, Huns are some of the more confusing creatures on earth.
Let us start our discussion of the Hunnish character in the context of humour. The Hun has a reputation for being humourless – a reputation that most Huns are fully aware of. Please allow me to tell you of an instance when this was made clear to me. Last Sunday, through an act of mass spite by the Deutsche Bahn proletariat all trains for the hour were cancelled. Trying to bide my time, I returned to kiosk at Trier Hbf for a second cup of coffee. The attendant, slightly bored due to light traffic, was more than willing to stop and chat. Our discussion eventually touched on jokes. A female Hun, also desperate to stave off boredom, had joined our little conversation a few minutes before. Thinking of nothing better to do, I told them the joke about the world’s shortest book being The Complete Collection of German Jokes. The attendant, clearly of West African extraction, had a laugh. Surprisingly, the Hun laughed loudest and thanked me for telling her a joke to add to her collection. German humour, it seems, tends to be highly situational. Perhaps not the best joke tellers, Huns still find humour in daily situations and make sport of what they can.

Continue reading “Living With Huns IV: the Hunnish Character”

Balaclava Day

No, it’s not going to be particularly cold in the salubrious suburb of East Acton. I refer to the day of commemoration of the Battle of Balaclava, 160 years ago today.  The battle was the second major engagement fought by the British Army in the Crimean War and was fought because the British contingent of the Franco-British Army deployed in support of the Ottoman Empire had been given a position in the developing siege of the Russian fortress and port of Sevastopol.  `The Russian general, Menshikov, had taken the bulk of his army out of the defences of Sevastopol to preserve operational mobility and attempt to sever the communication lines of the Allied Army and attacked the port of Balaclava in the early hours of the morning of the 25th October 1854. Continue reading “Balaclava Day”

Little things please little minds . . .

While sipping my second restorative mug of tea this morning, I chuckled quietly at the good-humoured badinage, subsequently removed, between Janus and Christopher on the subtleties of ‘council’ versus ‘counsel’.

But I almost spilt the scalding contents when I moved on to read Mr Mackie’s splendid gaffe ‘from whence’.   And with relevance to Charterhouse, too.   An old Kingstonian would never perpetrate such a solecism. 🙂

If you need an explanation, there’s absolutely no hope for you.

5 years

So Oscar Pistorius was sentenced to 5 years jail for the killing of his girlfriend by shooting at her through a toilet door!

The feeling down here (and I spoke to a fair cross section of people yesterday) was one of relief that any sentence was not wholly suspended and that it wasn’t long enough!

But that’s ‘justice’ these days, one has to accept that times have changed and move on.

Relocating Rhino

Is this not a wonderful photo? I just had to share.

It was on the front page of one of my Sunday reads today, it was accompanied by an article explaining that Kruger are relocating over a thousand rhino from ‘high risk’ areas (read close to Mozambique border) to other parts of the park, other parts of the country and even other countries (Botswana and Namibia were mentioned.) Good luck to them.

There was more good news on my 1 o’clock news bulletin. Continue reading “Relocating Rhino”