General – Page 149 – Boadicea's Chariot

Tourists

Well it’s that time of the year again, the annual invasion of the binnelanders! They start arriving from the first week in December peaking round about now and like the great Serengeti migration it’s an annual event and unstoppable.

Continue reading “Tourists”

To the rescue

While hiking along the white cliffs of Dover this morning I noticed a Muslim extremist slip from the cliffs and fall into the English Channel. He was struggling to stay afloat because of all the explosives he had been carrying. If he didn’t get help he’d surely drown.

Being a responsible Brit, and abiding by the law of the land that requires you to help those in distress, I informed Kent Police and the Home Office.

It is now 4 p.m., he has drowned, and neither authority has yet responded. I’m starting to think I wasted two stamps.

An Open Letter to the Furry Mustelid.

Sir,

It has been brought to my attention that, following a recent success in the highly regarded 19^th Photography Competition, the only thing standing between me and the first ever Triple Crown award here at Boadicea’s Chariot is a positive decision regarding the Creative Writing Competition wisely and skillfully set by your good self and closing in the next few days.

A lifetime spent in the business of marketing valuable and useful technology to reluctant corporate personnel has taught me the value of careful and thorough preparation of one’s case. I offer the following observations merely as background to what will obviously be a difficult and demanding decision which you will be required to make following December 28, 2011.

-Read on for a valuable offer.>

Eat, Drink and be Merry – 20th. Photo Competition

Well, it is the season, and to encourage participation let’s make this one easy. We will all be doing this in the next few weeks, so take along that pocket camera and get some good ones.

Eat Drink and be Merry, closing time – Midnight January 15th 2012

Results of the 19th Nervous Photographic Competition.

The deadline is here, so, as Gregg Wallace says “STOP COOKING NOW!”

It is a shame there were not a few more pictures, but the ones that are there are varied and show some great imagination. I am surprised no-one took a picture of the fairy on the Christmas Tree. Yes, I know the joke about Grumpy Santa and his striking elves!

Continue reading “Results of the 19th Nervous Photographic Competition.”

What a load of bollocks!

I have just watched the film, ‘Black Swan’. What a completely crap, pretentious load of bollocks it was. That it won an Oscar for Natalie Portman baffles me. Except it didn’t, once I saw the names of the people involved in its making, at which point, I am afraid my worst tendencies came to the forefront. I am not a particular fan of Mel Gibson, especially following such films as Brave Heart and Patriot, but I think he and Charlie Sheen have a point.

People’s Poet, Roger McGough

I have for a long time enjoyed listening to ‘Poetry Please’ on Radio 4. I particularly love listening in the garden, whilst working on the borders in the Summer months, for example.
Not all the poetry is to my taste and a big chunk of it is ‘poetry learned at school’ as requested by members of the listening public – but it is all read so beautifully and there’s a wide choice, so get to hear poets and poems that I have haven’t yet read. There are numerous publications – I googled and discovered there’s now a CD which was released for an anniversary, which may just slip onto my Amazon Wish List!

‘Poetry Please’ is not currently on the schedules, (so I can’t send you to a ‘listen again’ link) but then presenter, Roger McGough, he of Lily the Pink and Scaffold fame, is busy taking on a new responsibility. Continue reading “People’s Poet, Roger McGough”