Author: christinaosborne

Landed on one side safely.

Groaners

  • The fattest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference.  He acquired his size from too much pi.
  • I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
  • She was only a whiskey maker but he loved her still.
  • A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of maths disruption.
  • No matter how much you push the envelope, it’ll still be stationery.
  • A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
  • A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in linoleum blown apart.
  • Two silk worms had a race.  They ended up in a tie.
  • A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall.  The police are looking into it.
  • Time flies like an arrow.  Fruit flies like a banana.
  • Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
  • Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway.  One hat said to the other: “You stay here, I’ll go on a head.” Continue reading “Groaners”

A Thank You to Bearsy

Just a line to thank Bearsy for the munificent gesture of providing a link to the new Out Doors blog.

It was pretty obvious that MyT did not want gardeners, no group on offer, no picture facility to speak of and not even the politesse of an answer!  So we took ourselves off elsewhere!  One is at a bit of a pass to know who exactly MyT does want these days!

But a big thank you to Bearsy for putting out for us!

Darts Hill

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Some pictures of a private garden owned by Surry City Council.  Sorry, Surrey Vancouver! Last weekend our garden club went on one of our organised trips to Canada for a docent led tour of this garden in the Fraser valley which is not open to the public, a very warm spot.  Pity the docent didn’t know her stuff, not very knowledgeable about the species, poor lady just her luck to pull a garden club rather than any old disparate bunch!  A lovely day, an excellent lunch and a walk around an arboretum in the afternoon and no aggravation at the border.  The border guards always seem to have real trouble with the fact that people actually go across International borders to see gardens, seem incapable of actually getting their heads round it conceptually and asking stupid questions like why!

Morons.

Very amusing.

I have just found this on Norman Tebbits blog today in the DT,  by someone called ‘ timbury’.

I thought you might enjoy it.

Battle Hymn of the UK Electorate

Mine eyes have seen the Tories come a-claiming their reward,
Although they did quite poorly and the warnings were ignored,
The moral of the story is the Tories must applaud
Electoral reform…

For Tory votes were less than half, as a-foreseen in the polls,
And in the voting’s aftermath Dave passed the begging bowl,
So Nick has got the last laugh as he held them to the coals,
As to the manner born…

For Nick’s the new king-maker, he’s a-fighting for PR,
His vote’s a make-or-breaker, it’s his finest hour by far,
But is Nick a high-staker or just wants a bigger car?
Will pacts become the norm?

(Chorus)
Brown, you had it coming to you
Brown, you had it coming to you
Brown, you had it coming to you
The debt goes marching on.

Continue reading “Very amusing.”

Garden for pseu

I must preface this with the reminder that this is how I personally would treat this new area and is subject to my own personal tastes.

We have a triangle roughly 18’x16′ facing mainly East with early morning sun, ph neutral to alkaline that has previously been laid to lawn.  The requirement is mainly shrubs with some perennials, some evergreens and with mainly white flowers.

Continue reading “Garden for pseu”