Other People’s Babies

Yesterday I visited my brother and his family. He has since last year become a grandfather and his grandson was there.

Nice little chap, about ten months old, and generally quite smiley. I did the ‘normal’ sort of stuff – you know: ‘doesn’t he look like xxx’, and waved and smiled… and carried on with the conversation.

Then he started to moan and wail. At that point the procedure of ‘pass the parcel’, or in this case, ‘pass the baby’ began and it was suggested that I might like to try to ‘quieten’ him. All I wanted to do was to escape into the garden to admire the gooseberry bush,  the flowers – well just about anything to escape the noise. I had to explain, as I do so often, that I really do not like picking up and cuddling other people’s babies at all. I’ve tried to do it to be polite, but it’s fairly obvious that I’m not comfortable, so long ago I decided to be honest and up front. Bring them along when they are walking and talking, but even then do not expect me to go ‘dewy-eyed’ and cuddle them…

The Arab Bus to Bethlehem – Christmas 1981

So, there we were in Jerusalem at Christmas and what are you going to do?  Jocks and  keenly aware that we all had at least one relative who would never forgive us if we didn’t do Bethlehem. Mrs M. had her granny and I had three Highland maiden aunts.  Alexanderina (Ina), Christianina (Chrissie) and Hugh Ellen. (Huellen).

To explain, Grandad had promised all his brothers that he would name his children after them but Granny kept producing daughters apart from Uncle John and my Dad. Mary was the first-born and got away with it and also got married. My other paternal aunt, the memorable and oft-mentioned Auntie Dolly (Donaldina), was as far away from being a maiden as it was possible to get and seriously irreverent and irreligious with it. I knew that all I had to do was send her the usual filthy postcard to stay in her good books. I also knew that Ina, Chrissie and Huellen would be really hurt if I did not come through on the Bethlehem front. Continue reading “The Arab Bus to Bethlehem – Christmas 1981”

Cupboard Love

The rumour was that Miss Rosenthal had been found in the chemistry lab store cupboard with Mr Armitage with her blouse undone, and buttons missing, and her hair all over the place, and that the headmistress had called them into her office to discuss their future prospects at the school. Continue reading “Cupboard Love”

Voice’s off

You don’t realise how much your voice contributes to your personality and the way people see – or rather, hear you – until you lose it.

And losing your voice is not like losing the car keys. You can’t have a hunt around for it and find with some relief that you locked it in the garage or threw it carelessly into the dustbin with a piece of old kitchen roll and the potato peelings. Continue reading “Voice’s off”

A flaw in Greek philosophy

Keep this in mind the next time you are about to repeat a rumour or spread gossip.

In ancient Greece (469 – 399 BC), Socrates was widely lauded for his wisdom.

One day an acquaintance ran up to him excitedly and said, “Socrates, do you know what I just heard about Diogenes?”

“Wait a moment,” Socrates replied, “Before you tell me I’d like you to pass a little test. It’s called the Triple Filter Test.”
‘Triple filter?” asked the acquaintance. Continue reading “A flaw in Greek philosophy”

Greetings from Bucharest

And just to let you know that I am plotting to take over this place – according to whacko jako, that is:

Don’t ignore Bravo; or do so at your peril. The guy is a bag of deceit [good grief, in a few months from the head of a large American International Tobacco Company in Moscow, to having his own Team on a Security Contract when the bomb went off and “his contract” ended, a promise of a new contract in Bulgaria but now sitting at the pool in Cyprus where his whole extended family of dozens and dozens of cousins have suddenly been domiciled for generations and taking care of his new found library]; he runs The Club; the others are just his minions.

It may be convenient for him to let you think that it is the other guy because he is struggling in his battle to take the Chariot when Boadicea goes. People have latched onto the real guy; he now gets three to five comments per Post at the Chariot and not a single one in his personal WordPress Site.

That is why he has moved back into MyT, to rebuild his reputation and because he is a useless Blogger on open forums.

So, now you know.