Fifth photography competition.

After much wracking of brains, I finally managed to dredge up an idea for the next Photo Comp. It’s a fairly simple idea, and I think it might be interesting to see where the Charioteers take it. We see patterns all around us, all the time, but sometimes we don’t ‘see’ them, (apart from the more artistic of us, who post images that the rest of us look at and think, ‘Why didn’t I see that..’)

So the theme for the next competition is simply that: ‘Patterns.’ No queensbury rules for this one, it’s rough and tumble, anything goes – in other words, images may be manipulated in any way wished to produce the effect desired by the entrant.

Following the example set by Coldwater John, I have pulled a few shots out of my albums. None of them would impress me enough to win this month’s competition, but they all have patterns in them that might be pulled, pushed, stretched, squashed or otherwise knocked into shape as a competition entry. (Except the fuel bowser, which I came across while I was looking and stuck in as a bit of nostalgia – it’s Cyprus as it was before the invasion and all the development that followed – 1969, in fact.) (Some of the shots are quite old and needed repair when they were scanned.)

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Deadline for entries is 23.59 hrs GMT on 11th March – that’s three weeks + a little bit because I’m going to be away – in London as it happens – that week.

Chrome-wheeled, fuel-injected…Born to Stroll

A charlatan I know swears that you don’t need to pay parking tickets. He claims that he receives tickets all the time and ignores them. The costs on taking him to court are not worth the council’s time, he says and adds that loopholes in legislation should be exploited. I disagree with him as without law and order there would be chaos and uprising followed by a resumption of law again so what’s the point in revolution.

My principles were tested to the full yesterday when a driver parked on the zig-zag lines at a traffic crossing. Immediately, I swung into my assumed character as an off-duty Traffic Warden and the only thing stopping me from rebuking the errant driver was his mode of transport: it was a tractor. Continue reading “Chrome-wheeled, fuel-injected…Born to Stroll”

Gynecologist who became a mechanic

(If you do not laugh out loud on this one, your “laughter” is broken!)

A gynecologist had become fed up with malpractice insurance and paperwork, and was burned out. Hoping to try another career where skillful hands would be beneficial, he decided to become a mechanic. He went to the local technical college, signed up for evening classes, attended diligently, and learned all he could. Continue reading “Gynecologist who became a mechanic”

Intimate massage

Quite frankly, I find the sight of pensioners intimately massaging each other quite off-putting.

I don’t expect to have to avert my eyes in the local garden centre but there they were blatantly stimulating one another right between the dahlias and the dieffenbachias. Continue reading “Intimate massage”

5th Poetry Competition

I thought it might be interesting and the results amusing, to ask Charioteers to write some Clerihews. I am sure most are familiar with the form, but if not, here is some background, pinched shamelessly from Wikipedia.

Form

A clerihew has the following properties:

  • It is biographical and usually whimsical, showing the subject from an unusual point of view; it pokes fun at mostly famous people
  • It has four lines of irregular length (for comic effect); the third and fourth lines are usually longer than the first two
  • The rhyme structure is AABB; the subject matter and wording are often humorously contrived in order to achieve a rhyme
  • The first line consists solely (or almost solely) of the subject’s name.

Clerihews are not satirical or abusive, but they target famous individuals and reposition them in an absurd, anachronistic or commonplace setting, often giving them an over-simplified and slightly garbled description (similar to the schoolboy style of 1066 and All That). Continue reading “5th Poetry Competition”

Fourth Photography Results

Some great shots in very difficult weather conditions, in the UK at least – and some brave attempts to cope with what was a very specific brief.
Low Wattage’s Dawn over Pond, Pseu’s Blue skies, Bootsy’s vivid red skies, Tocino’s pink twilight all appealed to me, as did JM’s valiant Embra evening image, but in the end it came down to Sipu’s Mozambique Beach Dawn and Bravo’s Moscow Winter Dawn, both non-UK entries.
Sipu’s composition and subject attracted the popular vote, scoring 4/9 votes, and I liked it very much, however the one which appealed most to me as Judge was Bravo’s Moscow Dawn, which had an unusual and well defined foreground and the soft pastel skies of twilight, which is what swayed my own decision.
Over to you, Bravo!

Poetry Competition – Nursery Rhymes – Winner

As you will have probably seen for yourselves on the Poll, Sipu is our clear winner.

Congratulations, Sipu!

On behalf of Janus, thanks are due to everyone who entered and also to all of you who read their beaut submissions and voted.   Let’s hope Janus is back soon, even if they are both a year older. 😎