Here’s a fun challenge for cherished colleagues. While watching a recent NFL game (that’s American Football to some or Gridiron to others) the production team came up with a couple of humorous takes on movie titles …
SILENCE OF THE RAMS
The St Louis Rams are having a bit of a tough time of their opening fixtures this season and this title is more than appropriate 🙂
THE GREATEST SHOW ON TURF
Another title from the yanks, I can’t quite recall what they were referring to but I cant quite imagine a greater show than winning a world cup!
WEST SIDE TORY
This one is all my own work! I’m not even sure if London has a West side or if Boris has even been there, no matter, I thought my play on the title appropriate and funny.
So, thinking caps on, can any of you top these three?
Boadicea's Chariot 
Lunnon has a West End, but you’re near enuff for a foreigner. 😀
Howzit Bearsy, thanks for the headsup, helps my title work.
How’s about GREECE 2, with Angela Merkel playing Olivia? 🙂
Ad for tea:
One brew over the cuckoos nest
James Bond decides to move into catering:
The Man with the Golden Crumb
James Bond decides to move to the Lake District and write books on walks:
A view to a hill
A film about a lost shepherd:
Sheepless in Seattle
A film about the dangers of mathematics:
Fatal Subtraction
A film about TB
Great Expectorations
Bearsy’s biopic:
The wizard of Oz!
Excellent, keep em coming
THE GRANDFATHER
Starring
With guest appearance by
My like included the comments!
A film about the cottage industry of Woodstock
Women in Gloves
“Reservoir Frogs” let’s not jump to any conclusions about this one until we’ve seen it.
Bakers United film:
It’s a wonderful loaf.
Ben Him, with Arnie Schwarzenegger and not a weed like Charlton Heston 🙂
Blackhead Down, the adventures of a cosmetics saleslady.
A heist film “Thief encounter”
A bullfighting film “Planet of the capes”
A horror film for charioteers, be very afraid ” Twenty thousand FEEGS under the sea”
I am coming to get you, JHL 🙂
A film about the job protecting good ideas:
“The English Patent”
A film about the job of protecting good ideas:
“The English Patent”
A film about the all day breakfast:
“The Frying Game”
A Batwoman sequel “One Pseu over the cuckoo’s nest”
Allowing for inflation:
Catch 99
Film about a kid with one Jewish parent and one Spanish parent has major identity crisis.
“I don’t know whether I’m Carmen or Cohen”
Film about a discovery of some ancient vegetables
“Bodicea’s Haricot”
nice one, JHL!
From the French Wineries
‘A brief history of wine’
West Indian lifestyle film:
Pilates of the Caribbean.
In London this week -” Ball Fight at the O2 Corral”
A way to travel and keep things fresh
‘A fridge on the River Kwai’
A confusion over citrus fruit?
‘My Darling Satsuma’
Queen turned Waitress
“Helen of Tray”
A Danish Bloggers Life.
“Chariots of Ire”
Porcelain Gorilla makes Good.
“Ming Kong”
Docu – drama on Prince Charles’ long wait for kingship
“Romancing the throne”
Spielberg directs his own life story.
“The Magnificent Steven”
Wine drinkers break out.
“The Grape Escape”
LW you are ON FORM!
Famous tenor stranded on remote atoll.
“Robinson Caruso”
Wine drinkers galore:
“Grape Expectations.”
Old ladies and ice cream story.
“Kind Hearts and Cornets”
And at the beach when you need an icevcream:
“All queues on the Weston front.”
Wine Tasters Mantra.
“Grape Expectorations”
Living Popes duet.
“Only Two Can Pray”
Wales England Game.
“The Good the Bad and the Rugby”
A sticky end for Mr. Guinness?
“The Man in the White Suet”
A chocolate hawk?
“The Malteser Falcon”
Monty Python and the Holy Grail.
“A Knight to Dismember”
Kids Horror Movie.
“Dracalculus”
It’s like, the end of the World y’know?
“Karmageddon”
🙂
Man shut in freezer all night:
‘Cold finger’
How to update your home:
“Back to the furniture”
What you may win after a power cut….
‘The Dark Night Prizes’
The Tardis lands in the deep South.
“Guess Who’s coming to Dinner”
Nelson’s Navy and Piracy.
“Master and Commandeer”
Something about flying turkeys?
“The Right Stuffing”
Students on the rampage?
‘The Beer Hunters’.
Too many beans>
‘In the name of the farter’
Religion for the thinking man?
“The life of Brain”
DArn it… I’ve been looking at that one, LW… you got there first
If you don’t pay, I’ll repossess you.
“The Extortionist”
What do you think of a ‘A Streetcar named Deidre’?
Or
“The Exhibitionist”
Pseu has promise, what about.
Riding around looking for one’s pension cheque?
“A Streetcar named Retire”
For someone who wants to do it their way and add meaning to life….
‘The Existentialist ‘
And out on the moors there’s a beast more frightening than a Warewolf, It’s
“The Big Sheep”
Wartime, somewhere in Africa.
“Casabianca”
History of the en-suite?
‘Room with a loo’
Vegetarian Nailbiter.
“The African Quorn”
Natural history film about deer
“Glade Runner”
And after a while the weather really gets you down
“Whingeing in the rain”
Angry pancake cook during great depression.
“The Crepes of Wrath”
A film about BBC Radio two presenters:
“Planet of the creeps”
Table top games, maybe?
“American Subbuteo”
Story of an immensely tall Caliphate.
“The Longest Dey”
All about the artists who fake paintings
‘The retouchables’.
Life with computers taking over the world:
“Modem Times”
Out of Pre-med and into Practice.
“From Here to Internity”
Children loose their playground due to thugs
“Raiders of the Lost Park”
A film about the maintenance of places of worship:
‘Four weldings at the cathedral’
There’s writing on the wall….
“Local Biro”
Controversial film about PMS
“The Full Monthly”
I’m getting to the end of my teher here:
“The phoney-ness of the long distance punner”
Futuristic drama well ahead of it’s time.
“1948”
To keep the crew from going hungry:
“Monty Python’s Loaf of Brian”
Republican favorite (nominated for worst movie of all time).
“All the King’s amen”
“Controversial film about PMS
“The Full Monthly” ” – 🙂
— And it’s good night from me….
Yup gotta go cook chow. We will try to make 100 tomorrow.
A Tale of two enthusiastic bloggers –
Chariot’s on Fire
Al Gore makes a movie on old age
“An incontinent truth”
Tarantino makes a movie on the red light district
“Pimp Fiction”
Richard Attenborough epic on life in an old age home
“Geriatric Park”
G’morgen, Soutie. Now look what you’ve done! 🙂
Môre Jay, less of the small talk and contribute please 😉
A Fistful of Dallas – a boxed set of JR’s life.
A charioteer in a soap
“Corrie n’ Janus”
🙂
Lie Hard – the adventures of Rebekah Brooks.
Murder in the kitchen
Tefal Weapon
UPS man braves white water route.
“Deliverables”
Strangely touching love story.
“The French lieutenant’s wombat”
William Wallace has flash of brilliance.
“Brainfart”
Dressed to kill.
“The Day of the Jacket”
Russian epic done to death.
“Worn Piece”
Breathless costume drama.
“The Great Gaspy”
21st century Shakespeare.
“Romeo and Julian”
Angela puts it to the Ionians.
“My Big Fat Greek Weeding”
Hang on chaps, give a girl a chance…. just back from work, doncha know?!
Tales of moving aircraft around for storage on the ground:
‘The Hanger Games’
Anglican Bishop out of his depth
‘Sermon flishing in the Yemen’
Scientist debate the preferred temperature scale:
‘We need to talk about Kelvin’
Essential watching for getting the most out of your military units
‘How to train your Dragoon’.
Film set in an underwater convent “The abbess”
A film about a late King
“Richard deferred “
Sovereign gets primal therapy.
“The King’s Screech”
GI avoids emasculation.
“Saving Ryan’s Privates”
A cab driver finds himself the hostage of an fast food chain owner, as he makes his rounds from hit to hit during one night in Los Angeles. He must find a way to save both himself and one last victim from cardiac misery…..
“Cholesterol”
A faded opera star looses his voice….
“Lost n Castration”
A film about a late King who was put off at the last moment:
“Richard deterred “
A film about a late King who had continence problems
“Richard de turd “
I shall stop there. Tea time
A film full of weird automatons.
“A Clockwork Derange”
One for you, Pseu.
Tony Perkins in a Hitchcock classic.
“Cyclo”
Charlton Heston in spicy sequel.
“The Ten Condiments”
PC remake of Monsarrat’s epic of North Atlantic warfare.
“The Cruet Set”
Suffocatingly sticky story, Swiss setting.
“The Sound of Mastic”
Silent Movie about WW2?
“The Dumbusters”
High speed financial risk avoidance.
“Blazing Straddles”
Beckett’s Birdwatching.
“Waiting for Godwit”
Nice one, Cyril!
An injured soldier’s lament
“I am Leg end”
An aeroplane has a power cut
“The Dark Flight”
Tricks with sound effects
‘The Sound of Magic’
The best barber ever
“The Lord of the Trims”
And the best hairdresser for women
“Lord of the Fringe”
Gok Wan restyles Jesus:
“The Fashion of the Christ”
Deep in the ocean, they encounter a new and mysterious infection:
‘The Abscess’
A film about computer engineers learning more hands on practical skills
“My Big Fat Geek Welding”
Revelations of a suburban plumber
“Close encounters of the turd kind”
The trials and tribulations of breeding and preparing dogs for Crufts
“Where beagles dare”
Psychological thriller
“The Jung ones”
Epic tale of a royal dynasty
“Reign man”
Scottish detergent documentary
“Snow white”
A rainy walk in the woods
“Forest gamp”
Storage Wars.
“Return of the Shedi”
Sheriff suffers heatstroke.
“High Swoon”
Greedy Pilot’s Story.
“Reach for the Pie”
When you try to wash it out it just gets bigger.
“The Andromeda Stain”
Bad times on Ilkley Moor.
“Apocalypse Nowt”
Riff time at sea.
“The Perfect Strum”
Film about the matriarch of this mongoose family
“Mama Meer”
Film about the royal family of egg-shaped furry novelty toys with googly eyes and small arms and legs
“King Gonk”
A film about the rigours of camping
“Tents and Tensibility”
Have the hurricanes ‘Pseu’ and ‘Low’ blown themselves out? 🙂
No, just resting.
A quiet Movie.
“The hoarse whisperer”
Western, not well acted.
“Shame”
Thinking too much about Movies?
“The Great Brain, Rubbery”
Chocolate Western.
“City Snickers”
Cowboys refuse to share beer.
“T’aint your Flagon”
Oh! so sweet, Mrs. Robinson.
“The Granulate”
GBS in Scotland.
“My Fair Laddie”
Cultural differences in family life explored:
“The English parent”
And the sequel
“The Finnish Parent”
The Little Mermaid revisited:
Finny Girl
I had to go to work….
blocked waterworks? Who you gonna call?
“Drain Man”
Very Forest of Dean this one, JanH would laugh.
Tony gets a ‘Fern Ticket’
“Anthony and Dryoptera”
Sci-fi shopping mall drama
“SparTrek”
An everyday story of country folk:
“Animal Fart”
Geographically challenged female, meanders through life, getting nowhere:
“Wander Woman”
Intimate areas, rubbing together
“Private Friction”
Affairs are an uphill battle
“The Gradient”
When the dog gets out and leads the deer a merry dance across Richmond
“Bend it like Fenton”
the story of the ‘Mobile Garden Centre’
“The Great Train Shrubbery”
It’s all about control:
“Pride and Prune Juice”
Life after prostate surgery
“The Perfect Stream”
The hero fights to regain his memory and three women come to terms with the shell shocked ship builder
..”The Return of the Solderer”
Pseu’s #177 got me thinking superheroes (where’s TR when you need him?)
The superhero who can’t always get his own way
“The Incredible Sulk”
How about one modeled on our cherished Danish colleague?
“Irony man”
Icelandic superhero heads south for his holidays
“Thaw”
Overweight superhero
“Fatman”
Lousy investment.
“The Poseidon Debenture”
Smartly Dressed Sheriff
“Urbane Cowboy”
Brown in an all white world.
“A Raisin in the Bun”
Spike gets indigestion.
“Goon with the Wind”
Sal left home.
“When Harry met Wally”
Somewhere in Windsor?
“East of Eton”
One has to pay to get OFF it.
“Swindlers List”
Woody Allen in Germany.
“Annie Heil”
Contract terms missing?
“Rebel without a Clause”
Annoyed at his partner.
“Shirty Dancing”
Romans attack Pearl Harbor.
“Tora! Toras! Torat!”
Grammar for beginners.
“Five Easy Parses”
Garage mechanic solves car problem …
‘Start Wreck’
Made Oi larf that did.
OZ
A classic of its kind in fact. 🙂
A non-judgmental cowboy movie – The Good, The Bad and The Cuddly.
OZ
Or a confused cowboy movie
“The Good the Bad and the Muddly”
storytelling pushed to its limit to create this movie of interconnected stories – but the sound track’s so poor viewers can’t hear what’s being said:
“Pulp Diction”
Old surgeon has to return to training after missed stictches
“Back to the suture”
young banker is accused of a double / triple murder but refuses / allows this to let his spirit be broken – so many versions of the truth
“The Shawshrunk Redaction”
“A Night before Oprah”
Liza Minnelli opens a wine bar
“Cabernet”
Tourist sees shadow in Adelaide River. Crocodile Maybee?
OZ
Argentinian Cracker.
“Ryevita”
Middle East remake.
“Conan the Besarabian”
Asian Spring celebration?
“Eastern Parade”
Noisy Musical?
“Carousel”
that should have been “Carousal”
Apple of my eye?
“Mary Pippins”
Nasty copper.
The Stinging Invective”
Uninteresting musical?
“Greys and Dulls”
Obviously a bad day.
“Sleet Clarity”
Post apocalypse communications breakdown.
“Mad Fax”
Train you dog to play percussion:
“Drumdog Millionaire”
Johnny Depp stars as bank manager in new Hollywood blockbuster
“The Loan Arranger”
It’s Gay Pride weekend here this weekend, parties, events, parades etc. If they film it …
“Drag Day Afternoon”
No more bunga bunga:
“The Italian Sob”
Or even
“The Italian Slob”
G’morgen, Soutie. Quiet again in these parts, but it’s early yet! 🙂
Môre Jay, indeed, this post was published last Sunday and look what happened! Who would have thought it?
BET365 has Pseu trailing Low by a whisker: 4 -1 v. 3 -1 for the championship, if they ever weaken!
Ah yes but it isn’t always quantity that counts, quality is also very important, there’s not much setting either apart!
Your could also train your amphibians
“Drum frog millionaire”
New drama company taking Macbeth to new heights
“Shakespeare on a plane”
Story of a beautician dedicated to inventing new ways for men to style their body hair beyond “Back, sac and crack….”
“Mad Wax”
Changing the pace of burglary
“The Ritalin Job”
A young, upper class or man, goes off the rails
“The Sloane Deranger”
Steve Martin’s “man with two brains” meets Ronnie Biggs
“The Great Brain Robbery”
Inspector Clouseau returns in a new location
“The Pink Panther strikes Wigan”
Monty Python from a a different perspective,
“Demeaning of Life”
Google gets together with Apple to get a bigger share of the pie:
“My Big Fat Geek Pudding”
Story of a manly love triangle
“Man with two Brians”
A relief in the scheduling:
“A Night without Oprah”
Lost in a sink hole?
“Monty Python and the Holey Trail”
A case of role reversal?
“A flasher called Wanda”
A fight in close up: all the fine details, from different perspectives
“Close recounters of the third round”
Dance movie for the digital age:
“Twerky Dancing”
Dance movie for Christmas
“Turkey Dancing”
Story of romance at work
“Glove Factory”
Monty Python again, with a mathematical slant
“And now for something completely differential”
And again, in an obsequious mood
“And now for something completely deferential”
Closer to home, how to get a lift to see some culture
“The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Gallery”
Chaos at the convent
“Nuns on the Rum”
Dental hygienist in love affair with elusive dentist….
“The Wizard of Floss”
A peculiar journey to the stars
” 2001: A Space Odditiy”
Tried dental implants and foaled?
“Back to the Denture”
Sorry, that should be ‘failed,’ not ‘foaled’
Communists try their hand t rhyme:
“Red Poets Society”
Robin Williams turns kinky?
“The Fishnet King”
Two insects meet up in Australia
“Bee reef encounter”
Cannibal who ate his mother in law film “Glad ‘e ate ‘er”
All done by touch
“Monty Python and the holy Braile”
The Italian who doesn’t know when to stop talking
“The Italian Gob”
Don’t let your fruit get damp:
“The Good, the Bad and the Mouldy”
A man in a legal but hurtful business needs an escort for some social events, and hires a beautiful prostitute he meets on the beach
“Gritty Woman”
The screenplay delves into different aspects of love as shown through ten separate stories involving a wide variety of individuals, many of whom are shown to be interlinked as their tales progress.
“Love Factory”
Two gardening rivals hate each other in the garden but fall in love over the pests in the garden
“You’ve got snails”
Sea bird thriller
Black Auk down
uncovering the details of the Watergate scandal and what he wrote about it….
‘All the president’s pens’
Idi Amin’s loses his way
“The Lost King of Scotland”
SOMEONE STOP ME
Nym, STOP! Think serene, spring morning, breakfast in bed! 🙂
Ha!
We have dull November….Spring seems a long way away.
My final one
Motorway accident spoils a lorry load of canned lubricants
“Crease mars car oil”
Student night out
“Gone with the Binge”
What’s this “STOP” business?
I’m enjoying every one of them!
As Sid James and the crew would say …
“Carry on Posting”
Really, Soutie!?
A movie about memory and a special nesting site
“Turtle Recall”
A brilliant all day breakfast in Scotland?
“Gregory’s Grill”
Yes really!
I’m chuckling away here at Turtle Recall 🙂
Film about your first film outings, in the back row
“The Fumble Book”
men of war distracted
“The Flirty Dozen”
Men of conflict annoyed
“The Shirty Dozen”
Oh well then!
Documentary about how famines occur
“Journey to the centre of the dearth”
Musical film about the joys of cooking offal
“Oh liver”
Haunted talk show host.
“Phantom of the Oprah”
What is he doing up there?
“Piddler on the Roof”
PC remake of Comic Book Hero.
“Conan the Librarian”
Spike and Harry go to Scotland.
“Brigagoon”
Split personality girl?
“Separate Mables”
Oops. “Separate Mabels”
Jealous girl of the previous title
“Anne of green Mables”
An historic telling of the failed attempt to capture several fridges on a road to Germany in World War II
“A Fridge too Far”
Just in: have just been listening to I’m Sorry I haven’t a Clue during which one round entailed film titles and how different they would have been with the addition of just one letter to the title. I didn’t catch all of them, but here are a few
The Spy who loved Men
Shaving Private Ryan
Dr Nob
Star Warps
The Derr Haunter
The Hunt for Re Fred October
Tory Story
The Cruel Seal
🙂
oops- the Deer Haunter (tag line, when Bambi’s mother returns)
For those who can access ‘Listen Again’
http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b006qnwb
ON the same theme
The Talented Mrs Ripley
Meet Men in St Loius
Marry Poppins
Shreek
Kung Fun Fighting
E.C.T
Morning Pseu
Are you suggesting that the BBC saw how successful our little challenge was and tweeked it for their own benefit? Can we sue?
Here’s one ~ “Landy in red”
Back on our theme,
Unruly schoolchildren
“Driving Miss crazy”
That very programme has frequently run this ’round’ in its show… so no, we have copied them 🙂
More from that show when I listened again, pencil in hand
The Lady Varnishes
Take the Monkey and Run
Bent Hur
Star Warts
🙂 🙂
Anne Of Green Marbles.
Super heroes again
Baitman
Thorn
Supperman
Irony man (okay, I know I did that one earlier!)
Mean in black
Doctor Strangle
Robo Coop
Welsh love story?
“All about Ewe”
Lindsay Lohan’s latest?
“After Detox”
Can’t remember if we did this.
“The Absent Minded Digresser”
Scary film about gardening.
“Airplant”
Toxic foot coverings kill at a distance.
“Aftersock”
Get thee to a nunnery.
“Advise and Convent”
Only 50% as good as Michael Caine’s original.
“Alfit”
Painful story of Gout.
“The Agony and the Extremity”
Katie Price goes flying
“Fakes on a plane”
Katie Prices plastic surgery history
“A tale of two ti…….
Tale of dexterity
Juggle book
The eternal love story
“From here to maternity”
-*+
+*+*A/
heartwarming an+
imal lovers story
“The thiry nine pets”
The history of the Yeti
”
The furred man”-
Texan Apple Pie story.
“The Alamode”
Philosophers porn.
“Deep Thought”
Nasty Australian remake.
“A Town Called Malice”
Newman’s girl goes through the mirror.
“Absence of Alice”
Newman plays hockey.
“Slip Shod”
Performing arts, Newman again.
“The color of Monet”
Newman as lucky gunslinger.
“Cool Hand Fluke”
Newman as Bricklayers Mate.
“Hod”
Newman and his horse.
“The Hostler”
Bogey in Wiltshire.
“The Calne Mutiny”
Bogey in North Dakota.
“Key Fargo”
Trouble in the sixth form
“The Prefect Storm”
Love on the shore:
“Nine and a half whelks”
May have been done before
“Flesh Gordon”
A caffeinated motive?
“Murder on the Orient Espresso”
Jewish prince is betrayed by his childhood pal, who gets him thrown in the galleys. H
“Ben Hurt”
Superhero turned irritable:
“Bratman”
A trainee pilot with a healthy disrespect for authority has something to prove to clear his father’s name as a dangerously reckless non-team-player…until someone decides to play a part in hindering this:
“Stopgun”
Not such a children story
“Beauty and the Breast”
Why does one always last longer than the other?
“Enduring Glove”
Man flu or just a cold?
“To Have and have Snot”
Automatic produce?
“RoboCrop”
The gentlest zombie movie ever made.
“Night of the Loving Dead”
A circus in the air?
“Fairplane”
Make your own tag line….
“Moansters Inc”
!950’s dance and hair styles….
“Greasy”
Cowboy film, filmed in Greenland
“No Country for Cold Men”
Cowboy with an unusual name
“The Magnificent Steven”
The ultimate Christmas movie… with a difference
“It’s a Wonderful Loaf”
Aaargh!! Pseu’s #334 beat me to the punch, here it is anyway.
Drug drama in Turkish coffee shop
“Midnight Expresso”
Fashion in the old west
“How the vest was worn”
Historical investigative medical doccie
“Great Explorations”
Fantasy with fatal results:
“Bunga games”
Football players and their habits:
“Great Expectorations”
HA! ‘Great Expectorations’ is the first repeat I have seen so far 🙂
A whole year withut condoms?
“The Year Of Loving Dangerously”
Get to the back of the queue to find out what that Greek book is saying
“Last in Translation”
Um. Excuse me miss, what about #40 and #347
“Um. Excuse me miss, what about #40 and #347 ” — so sorry, I didn’t realise 😦
“Withnail and It”
All about the wildlife in man made lakes:
“Reservoir Frogs”
men out of step with their time miss breakfast:
“The Wild Brunch”
One for our ‘Danish’ royal watcher
“Charles, Prince of trees”
New York cop John McClane is planning to visit his estranged wife Holly in LA for Christmas, but realises that he has gained too much weight and has to do something about it before he sees her…..
“Diet hard”
Robert Redford and Brad Pitt remake their blockbuster based on Masterchef
“Pie Game”
Cricket, but not as we know it
“The Umpire Strikes Back”
The story of a fishy parentage
“The Codfather”
David Attenborough makes documentary on insect life in Minnesota
“Little louse on the prairie”
Posh goes shopping
“Spend it like Beckham”
Or spread the news about celebrities making soups:
“Blend it like Beckham”
Love the ” Spend it like Beckham”
GCHQ promo movie about where the world is heading
” Gen is us”
More about the meat
“Who farmed Roger rabbit?”
No more hunger in the tower:
“The Lunchpack of Notre Dame”
Family crusade to free performing goat
“Free Billy”
War time cookery
“Reach for the pie”
Fashion show at female prison
“Jailhouse frock”
Discounting in pig farming
“Hambusters”
Nym, do you fondly imagine anybody is akshully reading all of these entries? 🙂
Also billed as: American uni’s star runner with abif ego.
Oh, tush! a big ego
Doing the Lands End to John O’Groats walk
“As you hike it”
A gardening book for the bad time
“War and peas”
Hunting movie
“Where Beagles dare”
Hey Jay!
What sort of comment is that? It’s patently obvious that others beside me are reading the comments, I for one look upon them as my regular morning smile
Sexy musical
“Arousel”
No more UFOs for me….
“Closed Encounters of the Third Kind”
Sorry, Soutie. I was trying to be funny. 😦
No problem, thanks for the explanation.
S
Now this is a new idea! Delete aletter from a well-known title. Er, how’s about……
Dressed up for a booze up:
“Alehouse Frock”
Film about Weegie addiction to bingo
A little prayer on the housie.
OZ
Biopic of the dog wot won Crufts.
Star Paws.
OZ
Not sleeping, but sad…
“Weeping Beauty”
New Dracula movie
“Vampire Strike Back”
Gardening series
“Phlox and the Ground”
Climate change story:
“The Blizzard of Oz”
And now:
“Harry Potter and the Half-baked Prince”
A basket case of another sort:
“The Twitter Man”
He just keeps on going:
“Rebel without a Pause”
Music for the silver surfers…
“School of Crocks”
American expatriate Harry Morgan makes a living on the French colonial island of Martinique by running fishing expeditions. But his cushy existence is transformed by wartime encounters with head louse infestations
“To Have and to Have Nits”
Movie on British prince
“Party Harry”
Chaplin keeps his notorious sentimentality in check and offers up one of the most durable gems of the silent era, following the Tramp’s varying fortunes as a gold prospector… he’s developed the most valuable tool of all
“The Gold Brush”
Golfer unite in this film about a destructive small mammal
“The Green Mole”
Teaming up with his father, Indiana sets out to try and find the seasoning
“Indiana Jones and the Lost Cruet Set”
A Halloween film
“Grand hag day”
Political tv program
“Panobama
Dressage competition.
Strictly Come Prancing.
OZ
Never seen that film, OZ…
Celebrity divorce saga
“Lock, Stock and 2 smoking quarrels”
Extreme dieting explained
“Fast and the curious”
A night with a less than perfect sleeping partner
The wind in the pillows”
Conversion of a military leader
Gengis Khant
“No country for old moans”
Roman equality saga:
“Ben Him”
Bird fanciers film
“Lady Chatterleys Plover”
or a divorce film
“Lady Chatterleys over”
John Prescott Biopic:
The Great Gitsby.
Paul Holloway Biopic:
The Life of Pie
Chicken Farmers Epic
“There Shall be Brood”
Toronto Mayor’s Story?
“Fat and Furious”
Cricket Classic.
“The World’s Greatest Over”
All Fred Astaire.
Fruity Love Story
“A Damson in Distress”
Dumb Love story
“Shall we Dunce”
He’s easy to dance with?
“Follow the Feet”
Bail delivered to your door?
“The Bond Wagon”
Fuzzy end of the World Drama.
“On the Peach”
Bulked up Musical?
“Royal Wadding”
Not the ideal date?
“Daddy Pong Legs”
All Neville Shute
Joinery film
“On the beech”
Cleaning film
“On the bleach”
Repairs to seawalls film
“On the breach”
Musical film
“On the Bach”
Military recruitment video
“How to train your Dragoon”
Poorly emperor film
“Julius Seizure”
Native American painting film
“Brave art”
Walking wherever:
“As you hike it”
Noddy in restraints:
“The taming of the Who”
Tale of a greedy politician
“Blair rich project”
Enlisting the help of skilled cowboy-warrior types, villagers make a stand against the overflowing banks:
“Magnificent Severn”
Life in car repair
“The Exhaustist”
A tale of bereavement….
“Grief Encounter”
A pair of NYC cops stumble onto a clothes smuggling gang:
“The French Collection”
Film on the history of bunga bunga parties
“The Italian yob”
Cookery for cowboys
“Braising saddles”
Cookery for Knights
“Romancing the scone”
434 comments!
“Nice harvest”
Horror movie on botched breast implants
“The Mammary”
The story of the conversion Bilbo Baggins to Christianity
“The Habbit”
Tale of a benevolent superlizard like creature
“Goodzilla”
French cooking
“The Lunchpack of Notre Dame”
Oz animated detective movie featuring family pet
“Scooby-Roo”
I’m seeing a few repeats… are we running out of steam?!
Morning Pseu, I was suspicious of my #438 is that the one?
Iberian equestriana:
“Spaintrotting”
Butch and Sundance short:
“Rainspotting”
I like the “Spaintrotting” spoonerism 🙂
Shucks, Soutie, it were nowt! 🙂
Indian/Irish laundry film
“Dhobi Mick”
A film about the history of the tutu
“Wee frilly”
Film about some old cheese
“Fawn Brie”
Newborn gratitude:
“Thanks for the mammary”
Soutie, might one enquire if/when this competition will judged/end? 🙂
A craftsman’s story of restoring and repairing
“A Beautiful Mend”
The story of Prime Minister’s Question Time:
The Good, the Bad and the Fugly
Story of a Shakespeare themed restaurant
“Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Fed”
More on the ice cream wars
“As you lick it”
A film about continence problems?
“As you leak it”
Documentary on 2007 British financial crisis
“Judge Fredd”
Mmmmmmm ~ what can I say?
After weeks and weeks of inactivity on these pages oft highlighted by your goodself and seconded by me who would have thought that this would turn into a runaway success?
LW’s comment 94 where he suggested that “We will try to make 100 tomorrow” shocked me no end! A hundred comments, impossible I thought.
Well, we whizzed past our century, sped past our double-ton at which stage I was hoping to equal Hashim Amla’s magnificent 311 not out against England at The Oval back in July last year.
With Amla’s total surpassed my thoughts turned to Brian Lara’s record test innings of 400 not out (I won’t mention against who)
With that milestone now history, I’m thinking of trying to equal or better the highest 1st class innings of all time ~ 501 (again Mr B C Lara)
What do you think?
And why not? Onward and upward, he quoth!
For Cricket lovers everywhere – Alastair’s Ashes.
For dyslexic drug addicts -Train Stopping
But what is it?
“The King and It”
The face that launched a thousand whigs
“Helen of Tory”
An Italian war bride had a four-day affair with Robert Kincaid, a photographer who had come to Madison County, Iowa, to shoot a photographic essay for National Geographic on the covered fridges in the area….
“The Fridges of Madison Country”
Getting their own back on everyting:
“The Revengers”
Kids horror movie
“James and the giant leech”
Italian fence painting film
” Captain Corelli’s Sadolin”
For those of you outside the UK its a trade name for a creosote replacement product
Awaiting a delivery film
“Freight expectations”
The film’s title refers to a highly aggressive extraterrestrial creature that stalks and kills the crew of a spaceship….
“Allan”
Five trapped in a rural farmhouse in Pennsylvania which is attacked by unnamed very affectionate monsters…
“Night of the Loving Dead”
What actually happens when you fall in love?
“Love Factually”
Bridget starts her own Friesian herd, which takes over her life and all her attempts to stop smoking, lose weight and find her Mr. Right.
“Bridget Jones’s Dairy”
The Tramp struggles to live in modern industrial society with the help of a young computer expert
“Modem Times”
More ice cream wars?
“V is for Vienetta”
John Wayne makes up his mind.
“West of the decide”
John sues a western State.
“The Oregon Trial”
John Wayne at the local fleapit?
“Stageroach”
The duke opens a chip shop.
“Frying Tigers”
Wayne classic, looking for lousy family.
“The Scratchers”
Wayne explains underwear protocol.
“How the vest was worn”
Big John down and dirty.
“True Grot”
The Duke has triplets?
“Trio Bravo”
John’s take on the golden one?
“Red Rivet”
To hunt or not to hunt? And what of the dogs?
“The Beagle has Landed”
NHS, a story of success
“Star Wards”
A a tale of fashion at the seaside:
“Brighton Frock”
Life in the evening of a restaurant….
“A tale of two sittings”
Drama in the traffic jams:
“A Journey to the Centre of Perth”
Tailor made suit,Sir?
” A tale of two fittings”
Life in rural Oxfordshire may not be so peaceful as you may think…
“War of the Wolds”
Ugly scenes in the future:
“Stark Warts”
English teacher inspires his students to a love of poetry and to seize the day – only they are awful, and no one wants to meet them….
“Dread Poets, Socially. “
“Nutting Hell” – what can I say?
A story of two siblings who can’t let one another out of their sight.
“The Glued Brothers”
Royal navy training film
“Hello submarine”
A green giant gets into an argument
“Hulk friction”
Film about running a netmaking company
“Knotting Bill”
Upset lovers story
“Surly valentine”
Autumnal gardening film
“Leaf fall weapon”
Film about weekend binges
“Saturday night and Sunday moaning”
Just getting silly now:
“Minty Python and the Honey Trail”
And that’s 500 comments….woo hoooo
Woodworking in a monastery
“The Chipmonks”
I’m gonna wait ’till Jay’s back from
spittingpettingcryingonwetting the new baby’s head before any pronouncements are made on the success or otherwise of this post and thread, It seems only fair..We’ve smashed Brian Lara’s record, all/any additions would be more than welcome 🙂
This is a 1955 American drama film about a confused suburban, middle-class teenager who is having problems with sentence construction
“Rebel without a clause”
This is a 1986 American teen romantic comedy-drama film about love and social cliques in 1980s American high schools and all the back biting
“Petty in Pink”
Drugs in a convent
“High Nun”
Hungover and flying
“Shakes on a plane”
Removing excess fur on from monkey’s
“Plane it off the apes”
Murder story where the bodies are found in a tent
“Carrion Camping”
C. S. Lewis in Ontario.
“The Chronicles of Sarnia”
T.H. in the Maritimes.
“Lawrence of Arcadia”
Strange Furniture Delivery.
“The Wicker Van”
Alien animal story
“Straw hogs”
Sellars Remake.
“I’m Alright Back”
Three Stooges?
“The Mo Between”
Story set aboard an ice breaker
“Snow boat”
Aging pop star in Africa.
“Lulu”
Aged story about underheated carriages.
“The Railway Chilblain”
The Red Dragon’s return trip.
“Barry London”
Toothless vampire story
“No fang for Abbey”
The number nine to Bethlehem.
“Exobus”
Story of a new tug boat
“Cracker tower”
Tale of a fat bloke in a diner
“A Fistful of Donuts”
OZ
And he’s still not replete so
“For a Few Donuts More”
OZ
Then their brother the Curate walks in and orders omelet so they decide to make a trilogy of it
“The Good, the Bad and the Eggly.
OZ.
Meanwhile, across town in Little Italy, their tubby cousin is taking lunch.
“A Tale of Two Pizzas”
OZ
Biologist studying insects
“A leaf ant man”
A fishy murder tale
Jack the Kipper
Road surfacing rivalry movie
“Tar wars”
French maritime songs from Italy
” The Mer chants of Venice
A man who may run a marathon?
“Snicker Man”
Heart-warming movie about a poor Victorian scullery maid who makes good at the end.
“Cinders Ella”
OZ
Tale of a milliner who makes all his own products.
“Hatman and Bobbin”
OZ
Fooling savages
“Conning the barbarian”
An eerily quiet undersea movie
“The silence of the clams”
A drunken one-night stand.
From Beer to Paternity.
A 1971 documentary about ice cream lovers
On Any Sundae
Earth is invaded by confectionary
Mars Bar Attacks
Braaing in Zululand
“Charka Zulu”
By way of explanation re my #537
Charka is a company that manufactures charcoal and briquettes which simplify lighting the fire 🙂
African dictator
“Sponge Bob Tyrant”
Slow train to London
“Thirty nine stops”
Jam making film
“The curd man”
Lost dessert film
“Robbing Pud”
Film about a Guinness record attempt for the tallest stack of books in the world
“The pilers of Wisdens”
Film about job opportunities at a football club
“Chances with Wolves”
Film about an accident with a chamber pot
“The poe’s side on adventure”
Early forensic science movie
“Robbing hoods, prints of thieves”
Glad you explained Soutie…. 🙂
Peter Sellers at the Circus.
“The Smelliest Show on Earth”
Sellers as a Chinese Detective.
“The Wong Arm of the Law”
Sellers in Cornwall.
“The Pasty”
Sellers in a stinker?
“Murder by Breath”
Sellers in Oyster Stew.
“There’s a Pearl in my Soup”
Sellers resisted this.
“The Man Was Never Who”
Boston’s lament.
“The Wrong Sox”
A genius boasts of his fame
“The Great Brain Snobbery”
National health training film
The health of patients”
Danish western
“Corraling Janus”
Roman advertising movie
“Chariots for hire”
An attic’s secrets revealed
“The Housecrap”
I envisage a scenario. Mr Mackie, having hosted a most convivial dinner last August, retreats to his terrace with a small libation once the guests have departed and all is quiet again.
“A Midsummer Night’s Dram.”
OZ
Sweary bomber crews.
“The Damn Busters”
(This one actually appeared as a typo on a post-raid dinner party menu in 1943.)
OZ
A film that is just a collection of dots
“For your i’s only”
Besom manufacturing film
“Broom maker”
Film about dog sled racing
“From musher with love”
The chips are ready
“Frycall”
Rites of passage
“Grow up”
Heartwarming story of a young owl called Olli learning to speaks
” Oliver Twits”
And the sequel
Young Olli falls in love and
“Twits to woo”
Heartbreaking story of a moggy held to ransom.
“Katnapped”
By the way, the NSW is making her own Christmas crackers this year and has plumbed this rich thread of humour for the jokes.
OZ
Reality show on the life of a modern orphan with cellphone in the big city
“Oliver Tweets”
Dickens goes porn
“Knickerless Nickelby”
Story of a depressed quadruped.
“Bleak Horse”
OZ
A Victorian poet with issues
“Hard rhymes”
‘The Story of O’ -aka ‘The Life of Pi r Squared’.
“By the way, the NSW is making her own Christmas crackers this year and has plumbed this rich thread of humour for the jokes” – which are her favourites, OZ?
Story of a night club for women’s pleasure
“Jack the Stripper”
Two hungry restaurant robbers flee….
“Brunch Cassidy and the Sun-Lunch Kid”
When the towns play area disappears without trace the detective get to work on finding the culprits….
“Traders of the Lost Park”
A dissenting juror in a trial examining the role of the restaurateur slowly manages to convince the others that the case is not as obviously clear as it seemed in court.
“12 Hungry Men”
Hi Pseu
I have to say that although this thread seems to be winding down on contributions, I have absolutely loved opening the comments first thing in the morning for my daily smile, today is no exception…
“Jack the Stripper”
… 🙂 …
I too was wondering which gems got the nod for the Christmas Crackers 😕
Crackling galore!
“Traders of the lost pork”
A hard story to swallow
“Gulp friction”
A gossipy ancient
“The blabbers of Hercules”
Spiritual cleaners
“Ghost dusters”
Arabian publicans tale
“Inn of the sheiks happiness”
A film exploring the theoretical delights of a twin pregnancy….
“Foetal Abstraction”
Soutie, I had been locked out of the site day before yesterday, despite being logged on and OK on my own blog… I did email you – not sure if you got it….Anyhoo, thank you if you were involved in ‘clearing’ me again.
I wonder if we shall discover the favourites chosen for the crackers?
A flit out west
“Moonlight cowboy”
An small garden ornament is accidentally left behind while his family flies to France for Christmas must defend his home against idiotic burglars.
“Gnome Alone”
Follows the lives of eight very different couples in dealing with their love lives in various closely timed tales all set during a frantic month before Christmas in London, England
“Love Punctually”
A film about a Prime Ministers trip to China to boost the economy in time for Christmas….
“A Christmas Tory”
Life after a prostatectomy?
“A Perfect Stream”
A long hot soak anyone?
“Radox of the Lost Arc”
A heartfelt plea from me to JW, Bearsy, Janus and any others who might understand.including such neutrals as Soutie.
‘We need to talk about Kevin (and Jonathon and Nathan and Pup and Tim and Darren and Adelaide)’
‘British Bake Off’ taken to the height of daftness
“Cakes on a Plane”
* to those not accustomed to British TV currently, there are a lot of cooking programmes… one of which involves Mary Berry, the baking recipe authoress… called “The British Bake Off” I believe
The drama of the farm near the railway and the dangers of cattle on the line
“Beef Encounter”
JM can you please explain that last one of yours?
The gang of park attendants set up in competition against one another…. it’s a battle for
“The Perfect Strim”
The sixth formers are revolting, and want to have a rock band competition to decide which is the best lead guitarist
“The Prefect Strum”
Life is like a box of chocolates…you never know what you’re gonna get – and I won’t be happy if I pick the cherry one….
“Forrest grump”
show business film about getting your ovwn back…. one of the darkest and most cynical films ever made
“All About Even”
Sewer maintenance crew an how they keep their spirits up….
“Singin’ in the Drain”
Hi Pseu
I refer you to the second word of the title of the Pulitzer prize-winning novel which was made into a 1999 film starring Emily Watson as Angela McCourt. I bet you’ve read it.
‘SALMOND PISHING ON THE UNION’
Ah yes, the cricket.
I did attempt to get conversation going on the 1st test in Brisbane …
https://charioteers.org/2013/11/21/ashes-banter/
Interest on these pages lasted precisely ONE day! 😦
Nevertheless, if none of our Ashes supporters get the ball rolling during the 1st day’s play tomorrow / tonight I’ll kickstart the discussion.
All about a dentist
“Mouth specific”
Off message – Mr Mackie #604. That picture encapsulates everything there is to dislike about Scotland and the Scots. Dump him! The wee feck is not doing your country any favours on the wider stage.
On message – Ginger McPerson eats curry, chips and deep-fried Mars bar then tries to relieve resultant gaseous pressure without following through.
“Brave Fart”
OZ
Film about the migratory habits of lapwings
“Suns and plovers”
Film about droughts in Scotland
“Burn free”
Thank you JM… yes I have read it, but did not see the movie 🙂
I always thought Elton John was singing
“Saturday night’s alright on Fridays’ when it was really,
‘Saturday night’s alright for fighting’..
.
here’s a film title for him
“Saturday Night Cleaver”
A film about sadness and loss
“Desperately Leaking Susan”
Smile and let the world smile with you
“All The Sterident Men” (thank you Victoria Wood)
And another one from the radio program, “I’m sorry I haven’t a clue.”..
“Medicating Rita”
He was no weight watcher but i loved his mind:
“My big fat geek bedding”
A heartwarming story about an MP who talked so much, he lost his voice
“The hoarse whisperer”
The story of a pimp with laryngitis
“The whore’s whisperer”
🙂
An agricultural sequel to Warhorse
“The mare of Casterbridge”
Al Gore remakes classic Steve McQueen movie, but drives a Toyota Prius instead of the iconic Ford Mustang.
“Bull–itt”
OZ
Feminist bodywarmer advertising feature
“Escape from cold tits”
Sellers take on ‘The cat crept into the crypt,crapped and crept away’
“A Sh*t in the Dark”
I mentioned recently that I’m off to watch the HSBC 7’s this weekend, I hear that there’s going to be a documentary of the event, it’s title?
“Lord’s of the tries”
Surgeons training movie
“Back to the suture”
Hyper kinetic College Musical.
“The Student Prance”
Anti-violence film:
“Guns I’ll Never Own”
A bit like ice-cream wars, but this time about the mobile fish and chip vans….
“The Frying Game”
Fish owners have an evil enemy – and it won’t move on…
“Local Heron”
Church evangelical movie
“The magnificent heaven”
documentary about dervishes
“The war of the whirls”
Drinking problems in Middle Earth
“The Goblet”
OZ
See if you are only an occasional contributor to this seemingly never-ending thread? Do you know how long it takes to read all the comments to make sure that you are not repeating the efforts of previous Charioteers? I do..
I may have missed a previousity in my scrolling and I see that Pseu brushed a butterfly wing past my intended offering at #76. Whatever and to keep the flow flowing.
A tale of Parisian washerwomen:-
“Wringing in the Seine”
.
🙂 JM
The story of the mule,
“Much Ado about Muffin”
Another Church evangelical movie
‘The Munificent Brethren’
Talking heads talk no more….
“Dead Pundits Society”
The best the NHS can offer?
“Star Wards”
A short film about lactose intolerance
“There’s Something about Dairy”
Supersized Beauty?
“Beauty and the Feast”
The story of Shakespeare and his dedication to writing however cold he was….
“Shakespeare in Gloves”
The trials and tribulations of the airport, when nothing goes according to plan
“Ground fog Day”
Another contender for an ice cream wars theme?
“District 99”
Well known movies actresses do their stuff for the men in their lives…
“Star Twerk”
This family really made their mark
“The Indelibles”
Documentary about sound recording
“As you mike it”
That reminds me of the Masterchef sequel about those who failed to make the grand final.
“The Inedibles”
OZ
A convent goes co-ed:
“The balls of St Mary’s”
By Soutie, Tonto’s colleague at the bank:
“The Loan Arranger”
Love it!
Ha ha Jay 🙂 🙂
Better put the joke here, for those who missed it the first time.
A naturist film for birds
“Where eagles bare”
A story of canoeing lumberjacks
“Tree men in a boat”
And of course there’s the other film about Rangers in London
“The Sloane Ranger”
Nym, I recall another TV cowboy from the days of one channel, whom I will recast as a young, joker:
“Rex Titter”
Children’s Christmas film? I don’t think so
“Frisky the Snowman”
Bread makers united:
“Passion of the Crust”
Story of murder most vile
“Three men in a boot”
A documentary about the design of underwear globally,
“Around the world in weighty stays”
Santa at large in London:
“Send it, like, to Peckham”
The film Mike Leigh didn’t make
“Nuts in Mary”
The adventures of a young Inuit boy and his intelligent pet penguin
“Slippy”
(I know, I know, penguins only live in the southern hemisphere and Inuits in the north but give me a break, it is after all a children’s story!)
🙂
(thank you for distracting from my last which may be considered a little risqué, Soutie…. )
Neil Diamond moves to Bolivia
“La Paz singer”
Barbara Striesand becomes an apiarist,
“Honey girl”
Film about the use of drugs for pregnant pigs
“Sows specific”
Film about the Italian Special Forces
“Who Cares Who Wins”
OZ
Another Italian forces movie (a sad one)
“Captain Corelli’s maudlin”
Another tale of the outback:
“Where emus daren’t”
Jenny Agutter gets garrulous
“Talkabout”
And in this one it’s all about touch
“The Braille-way Children”
The Met works on improving its arrest rate:
“For a few collars more”
When the wild life’s unpredictable you need somehting to sustain you…..
“Grouchy Tiger, Hidden Flagon”
Alfred Hitchcock’s most powerful, deep, and stunningly beautiful films – it is a film noir that functions on multiple levels. The work is a mesmerizing romantic suspense/thriller about a macabre, doomed romance – a desperate love for an illusion. It is an intense psychological study of a desperate, insecure man’s patchy skin colouration and loss of equilibrium.
“Vitiligo”
You know you’ve got a good engineer when everything runs smoothly
“The Silence of the Cams”
Can’t get all your inoculations in the UK? This film will tell you what you need to know about getting them abroad:
“The Italian Jab”
A less raunchy life of WA Mozart:
“Symphomania”
How gambling can take over your life….
“The postman only brings dice”
Taking a gamble when the pressure builds after an evening of beer and curry.
“Brave Fart”
OZ
Australian horror monster movie about a six foot chicken that attacks people in the forest
“Jungle chook”
Making the best of a situation?
“As you milk it”
Story of two expense claims and a gun fight
“Chitty, chitty bang bang”
An idyllic sci-fi future has one major drawback: life must end at 30…
“Logan’s Ruin”
Scottish tale of a burning trouser leg
“The flaming of the trew”
Tale of south eastern female foragers
“The berry wives of Windsor”
The Tour de France:
“As you bike it”
Smelly teddy bear.
“Winnie the Poo.”
OZ
or as a little girl I once knew thought it was really called:
“Wee-wees and poo”
As every parent knows there is a great deal of truth in the name of the game, poo sticks
Story of a runaway steam roller
“Flat man”
Film about a home lovin Russian girl
“Anna stays ‘ere”
Fish exporting movie
“The roe to Mandalay”
Professional female athlete training film
“Da make ‘er win”
A street girl wouldn’t eat fish and chips without them:
“Whore and peas”
Essex-girl goes to weight-watchers:
“Dja make ‘er fin?”
A brief history of woodworking machinery
“The pine machine “
A history of feminism
“The rise and fall of the woman empire”
Tea growers film
“The darjeeling bus of May”
Ooops, should be “buds” of course, although it does make another film about transport in India 😉
Oliver Stone succumbs to dyslexia (As an aside, why is that word so difficult to spell?) and makes a new movie.
“FKJ”
OZ
Nemo, the sequel:
“Jack the Kipper”
Violence in F1 film, Damien gets a glasgow kiss
“Nutting Hill”
Talking of childhood employment
“Sack the Nipper”
Well, Pseu has grabbed #700. Anyone fancy going for #1,000?
Touching biopic of a boozer who stays on the wagon.
“End of Daze”
OZ
Advertising film for a range of mexican products for a supermarket chain
“Spar. Tacos r us”
Famous author comes to town to launch his latest book
“The signing”
Do it yourself brewing film
“Easy cider”
And it’s sequel
“The beer hunter”
It’s still the 1st page that I open every morning and the entries always make me smile 🙂
As Buzz Lightyear would say “To infinity and beyond!
Robert Redford and Brad Pitt make sequel to their brilliant spy movie, based on a schizophrenic sign language interpreter who rubs shoulders with Kings, Presidents, Prime Ministers etc.
“Sign Games”
Musical film about an ice breaker
“Floe boat”
Film about chicken dinners in the White House
“All the presidents hen”
… and one on bill Clinton’s term
“The President’s harem”
Would that be a blow by blow account? 😉
Ha ha
… 🙂 …
Story of a failed show jumper
“The wouldn’t horse”
Wallis and Grommit tale of internet search failures
“The wrong browsers”
That one made oi larf it did.
Documentary about rock climbing
“The Great Escarpment”
OZ
Another documentary, this time about attempts to curb binge-drinking.
“The Bottle of Britain”
OZ
As, Rabbie Burns noticed – you should do it everywhere!
“Crave fart”
About over eating on Christmas day and its long term effects
“Groan with the Wind”
Snow White has a second career at a reporter in the documentary series about British Rivers: this one is the first in the series….
“Snow White and the Severn Wharfs”
Film made by aliens after their first visit to earth
“Airplanet”
Lawrenece’s little known sister in women’s rights campaign..
“Florence of Arabia
In an initiative to use less violent retaliation,
“The Empire Stokes back”
Pseu – One of the funniest charades I ever saw was one poor chap trying to do ‘Gone with the Wind’. Embarrassingly for him the result was not quite as planned. In fairness we, and he, were very, very drunk.
OZ
Charades! Now there’s a fun evening without the internet, Oz. Must remember to get that going at Christmas.
Royalty have a bad acid trip
“A freakin queen”
Welsh fishing movie
“The catcher in the Wye”
Greek mariner turns commercial
“Jason and the cargo ports”
Pseu – For maximum effect in charades a fair degree of booze must be involved.
Allowing for inflation.
‘Catch 42’
OZ
What a busy little hen!
“Hatch 22”
A make-up artist gives away trade secrets…..
“Angela’s Lashes”
Loosely based on the book by Charles Williams….
“Dead Clam”
Can we discuss the elephant in the room? I’m sure Oscar won’t mind….
“The Impotence of begin Ernest”
Horror story of decaying sweets
“Blight on rock”
Story about an extremely rare piece of china
“My Delft foot”
Tale of a man who runs round the mountains
“The glen miler story”
An timeless chinese cookery musical
“Wok around the clock”
Tale of an unsuccessful medieval doctor
“Four bleedings and a funeral”
A classic! 🙂
Love comes to a risk assessor
“Love actuary”
Life in the outback
“Bored of the Flies”
A film full of advice to the younger female generation…
“Never Let Men Go”
All about local wedding traditions…
“The Postman Always Flings Rice”
An emotionally-beaten man with his young daughter moves to his ancestral home in Newfoundland to reclaim his life – only to find that the daughter is distressed by the lack of fashion outlets…
“The Shopping News”
Tales of deep sea diving and living…
“Sleeping with the Anemone”
James Bond searches out a different career….
“A view to a skill”
When the real romance has left the relationship….
“Love Perfunctory”
Competition and rivalry in the kitchen….
“Who Flamed Roger’s Rarebit?”
Ultra fastidious housewife making milk drinks for the kids
“Shakes pears in gloves”
Lion’s tale of revenge
“I clawed he’s ass”
The do’s and don’ts of boating on the broads
“The fen commandments”
Animal welfare film
“Donkey O K”
Akshully
Hyperactive animal movie is better
“Donkey O T
Have we dried up?
Naaaw!
Biography of an orangutan, living in tropical forest
“Swinging in the rain”
Haven’t seen this film but there’s gotta be one
Sinatra biopic
“Scoooboe doobie doo”
Massive throat infection hits Scotland
“Croak awhile Dundee”
North American Indian tribe get together to service all their vehicles.
“Cree’s mass car oil”
Story of one man’s hunger
“James and the giant quiche”
Thor Heyerdahl film about the launching of his papyrus reed boat
“Rah’s put in”
And the last one for now
Musical about a blank wall for footballers expressing themselves through graffiti
“Paint your wag on”
Dried up? I hope not, not only are the titles a good laugh but (for me) bring back memories of days long forgotten, my mum used to love this …
Bruce Willis stars in docudrama based on the England Ashes tour 2013/14
“11 monkeys”
Driving a big 4×4 while on annual leave
“Hummer holiday”
Instructional shepherding film on how to keep your flock cool in extremely hot weather
“Water sheep down”
Natural history film about an egg
“Journey to the center of the oeuf
One of a series of films about how to deal with various road conditions
“Driving. Mist/hazy”
Film about the development of the European Community
“The big E.C.”
Yet another barrel of laughs:
“The big cheesy”
Promotional film to make solid fuel stoves even more fashionable.
“Chic Aga”
OZ
I am not sure if there is an adult section to this catalogue of films but I can think of some Dickens titles that could be reworked:
David Cop a Feel
Knicker-less Nicole B
Our Neutered Friend
The Pickwick Capers
Oliver’s Tryst
I will leave out the more lewd titles that might be arrived from the likes of
A Tale of Two Cities
Martin Chuzzlewit
Barnaby Rudge
Sketches by Boz
Promo by Boeing
“The blue plane innit”
Crumbs, chaps.
I have been working many shifts and have not been 100% well… so that explains my lack of input recently. I shall see what I can come up with…..
David Attenborough’s botany for beginners
“The leaf of plants”
Louisa May Alcotts tale of an untidy household
“Little Vimming”
Nervous flyer on an around the world ticket
“Around the world in eighty prays”
Uplifting tail of hares in the snow
“Scut of the Antarctic”
Tale of a young penguin with a stomach upset
“Crappy feet”
Native American tale of the pale faces taking over
“How the west was wan”
Tale of troubles at a childs magazine publishing house
“Mutiny at the Bunty”
Not so clean version of a star wars movie
“The impure strikes back”
Tale of a fallen tree in the Netherlands
“Raw clogs”
Vegetarian high-jinks:
“Salad lays”
Cornish exercises:
“The pilates of Penzance”
Not sure if this was ever a film, but it was one of the first TV soaps. Partly settled fishermongers bill
“Paid on plaice”
jhl, relax! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peyton_Place_(film)
Two Japanese visitors come to town
“Tourer, Tourer”
Relaxing spot for a female gardener
“Pearls arbor”
Wartime film about a POW who forgets her vest in an East European winter.
“The Cold Tits Story”
OZ
Tales of a binge drinking nun
“Bar Abbess”
Golfing tutorial classic
“Much ado about putting”
A Cryptic one
Dyslexic film about a big wave
“Nuts am I”
Story of kids being rude and leaving swiftly,
“Cheek ‘n run”
Traffic jams outside primary schools
“Pram clusters”
Not sure this was a film either, A guide to arachnids and wine
“Spider with rose”
Bono and Bob Geldorf appear as themselves in a film about music concerts raising funds for starving Africans
“Money Drain”
A bird joins the army
“Thomas the tank penguin”
Film advertising access to maternity services abroad
“Mothering Flights”
Life as an Autofit fitter
“Back to the Puncture”
Trouble at the mortuary
“The Right Stiff?”
Story of a boring obese french cook
“La dull chef eater”
The man who taught “brave fart”
Uncle slyass
Lessons in cat walk stance and style
“The Right Strut”
It’s all about control
“Back to the Sphincter”
And let us not forget TV baker Paul Holloway’s new book.
“Much Ado about Pudding”
OZ
Pseu, you are so nursey and I should know being engaged to one. What is said in the staff room stays in the staff room. 🙂
OZ
Did he do “Bun fight at the OK corral”?
JHL – Boom boom! The very chap! He also did “The Wide Praline.” (I need to get out more.)
OZ
Greg Wallace’s new film about fruit
“High prune”
OZ, would you prefer
“Back to the Tincture”?
Seasonal film of an Italian family reunion where the children reminisce on Grandma’s cooking disasters,
“The Ghost of Christmas pasta”
And murder in the east End:
“A Chistmas (smoking) barrel”
An Israeli workers story
“The pay of the shekel”
Grandma prepares traditional Italian fare for Christmas (again!)
“Pasta and the furious”
Diver gets a wave wrong and get dumped on the reef
“Corally anus”
Innit annoying, you put one up on the site and a better one occurs in the bonce like a bleedin flash
Mr Hyde disappears for twenty four hours
“The day of the Jekyll”
A tale of ethnic bread:
“The Italian cob”
Earthquake in Nottinghamshire
“Wobblin’ of Sherwood”
Friendly pests
“Flea amigos”
Casanova’s December diary
“The 12 lays of Christmas”
Santa’s close shave:
“The grate escape”
Filmed history of a public toilet
“Bogs life”
For those who are housebound and don’t want to go on holiday
“Chairplane”
Money’s tight in the Jone’s household….
“Budget Jone’s Diary”
She falls for the wrong man…
“Bridget Jone’s Fairy”
(Must be) fictional tale of an MP trying to claim expenses for fowl accommodation
“Beak House”
Fun in the air
“fairplane”
A politician forced into slavery
“The greatest tory ever sold”
Sandra Bullock and George Clooney in a heart-pounding thriller that pulls you into the infinite and unforgiving realm of making driveways….
“Gravelly”
A J.R.R. Tolkien previously unreleased book about his dark secret, now released as a film….
“The Habbit”
South African blogger takes anger management course
“The Calmer Soutie”
Ha ha Jh, here’s another
Oxford blogger transported back in time to her high school years
“Peggy Pseu got married”
or
Oxford girl ponders marriage
“Taming of the Pseu”
Thank you, Soutie!
Religious animal film
“Hares pray”
Film about how to cook venison
“Flambe”
One up man ship on the man with green fingers?
“The Man with the Golden Thumb”
James Bond does property makes overs shows
“Room maker”
Fishy tale of a lost American would be divorcee,
“Finding Reno”
Western american fashion film
“The a la mode”
Campanology film about defective equipment
“Re bell without a cord”
Cherished colleague is partnered with anutte:
“Nym for maniac”
Bugger: a nutter.
!
😉
A film about getting about whatever the circumstances
“A wheelchair called desire”
A film with a very clear sound track…
“Deaf Wish”
Love, despite the lack of a dentist….
“Toothless in Seatle”
erotic perverse movie
“Kink on”
Film about a disastrous Christmas lunch
“Sno Goose”
Incredibly, two films are released at the same time with the same title.
An aeroplane is taking passengers to a convention of gardeners. On the way one of the cultivators goes mad with the implements.
“Rakes on a Plane”
Because of a fault in the space-time continuum a consortium of seventeenth century libertines find themselves on an aeroplane headed to Ayia Napa.
“Rakes on a Plane”
Hi Pseu, I think I can Judd Trump your #845
A film based on a true story about Edinburgh’s trams
“A Streetcar named Disaster”
“Return of the Weegie”
Film about eating disorders in Wales
“Boney ‘n Clywed
One for the nerds:
“The IP-address file”
Elevator Wars Part 1. – Schindler’s Lift
Seafood Wars Part 1. – Alliance of the Clams
Seafood Wars Part 2. – Married to the Lob(ster)
Seafood Wars Part 3. – Prawn Free
An unemployed former defense engineer goes on a violent rampage across the city, trying to reach the house of his estranged ex-wife in time for his daughter’s birthday party. His mayhem is stopped when he enters an electronics shop and sees a game of rugby on one of the TV’s.
“Falling Asleep”
A film on beach volley ball, perhaps set in Brazil during the 2014 world cup …
“A Game of Thongs”
A pal and I were sat chatting the weekend and he said to me ‘what’s that trailer we saw the other day with the people running round with swords and bows and arrows? Game of thongs?’
Biopic of a man who claims he can eat a savoury cake in a minute.
Scone in 60 Seconds.