You could tell it was going to end in trouble. Let’s have a Mexican night, said one of the gang. So there we were- sombreros, ponchos and Zapata moustaches sitting in the back garden swigging tequila from the bottle waiting for the senoritas to bring us our grub. It was just as the jalapeno poppers stuffed with cheese and crab was placed on the table that this dangerous specimen crawled out of the woodwork.
Five of us backed off from the table spilling the chairs all over the lawn. We flicked our ponchos over our shoulders and went for our guns before we forgot we didn’t have any guns.
“That thing spits, stay back.” a gang member called Shane warned us.
“Tarantulas don’t spit” said I, using my limited knowledge of tarantulas to bring calmness to the situation.
From the kitchen appeared one of the mafioso’s molls (I might be getting my genres mixed up, doesn’t matter, stay with me, we’re nearly done). Using tweezers that were in her back pocket, thank heavens for Deus ex machina, she picked the spider up. Being Italian, she was an expert on hairy arachnids.
“Well, what have we here? A-huh. This is a new species which was recently discovered in Arizona and New Mexico. It must have been hiding in one of those imported crates and smuggled its way over here. This is a Aphonopelma Davemustainei. They are supposed to be deadly but this one is quite cute.”
Dave’s not the only star with a spider named after him. Other personalities with a creepy-crawly alter-ego are Barack Obama, David Bowie, Harrison Ford, Anton Miguel Rodriguez and Peter Parker to name a few. We started with farce let‘s end it with a bite. Play it Loud.