Space but not a lot

Still riding high after our week in Prague, Mrs J and I have spotted another get-away-from-it-all opportunity; this time an all-expenses-paid adventure offering travel, see-sighting (Mrs J’s word) and, best of all, celebrity – especially designed for the mature couple. Yes, it’s Mars and back with no interference from tour-guides, cabin crew, windmills, or LibDem canvassers.

Of course I have a few concerns. Will we be able to receive SkySport? Will we come back younger and miss the Ashes tour? Will the loo paper last? But one is bound to consider such weighty issues before departure, as ever; never mind the Meaning of Life which no doubt some of the couples vying for the trip will bang on about.

Any road oop, despite Backside’s insistence that the sponsors provide a leggy young blonde for his delectation, we’ll send in our application post haste.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-21603490

Author: Janus

Hey! I'm back ...... and front

15 thoughts on “Space but not a lot”

  1. Janus if you liked Prague try Tallin, really great little city, stay in the old town not outside it.
    Beer is good and everyone speaks English.

  2. My God, the horror of running out of loo paper!
    Being a one foot on the ground merchant and firmly of the persuasion that if you were meant to fly you would have been given wings can’t actually see the attraction of this caper!
    I wonder if he’ll get any takers?

  3. I would I like to be the first to open the hatch when they get back after 18 months or more cooped up in a metal box. The fug would be epic. Whenever the NSW visits she complains mightily about the odour of Wolf and testosterone, which it takes me several days to establish I would have you know. She now brings cans of Febrize and scented plug-ins to make the ambiance more ‘girly’. It’ll be chintz cushions and antimacassars next.

    Sob!

    OZ

  4. Oz you really shouldn’t use those chemicals half of them are carcinogenic! More in the category of the ‘invention of the devil’. If she must make the place artificially smelly, burning essential oils of various herbs is the way to go. Lavender and rosemary being two of the most effective, surprised she doesn’t know this ref her work.
    Include dryer softening sheets in this category too, seriously bad news, no wonder sperm counts are down, not your prime concern though, eh? (Well I bloody well hope not!!)
    You might well put off the need by a good scrubbing with a nice bit of old fashioned carbolic soap though!!
    Can you still buy it I wonder?

    Personally I am of the old school of wet dog, stale fag smoke, bleach and open windows! Perhaps I need to tell the terriers to change their knickers before they climb into bed at night!

  5. christinaosborne :

    My God, the horror of running out of loo paper!

    No problem, Christina. The lucky space travellers would just need to ensure there were plenty of back copies of the Guardian on board!

  6. Christina #5 – I don’t. An honest, natural Wolfly fug is much better in my humble whotsit, but not according to the NSW.

    OZ

  7. FEEG numero 6: ugh! I don’t know about you, but I value my posterior too much to let it get near the Grauniad. I find it difficult to even justify using it to line the chicken coop.

    OZ: I, for one, can understand NSW. As someone who feels devalued as a human if I don’t take at least 2 showers daily and obsess at all times about personal hygiene pleasant smells are very important.

  8. Couples only?

    I eagerly await the outcry from looney liberal left decrying the exclusion of queers. Perhaps Elton and his pals could muster together a billion or two and send up a ‘same sex spaceship’

  9. Soutie, g’morgen! I think the modern definition of ‘couple’ embraces (ugh!) shirt-lifters. 😉

    Christina, an occasional rubdown with an oily rag also works wonders.!

  10. ricksrant :

    Janus if you liked Prague try Tallin, really great little city, stay in the old town not outside it.
    Beer is good and everyone speaks English.

    Thanks, Rick. Akshully it’s ferry hop from here so maybe we’ll do it.

  11. christophertrier :

    OZ: I, for one, can understand NSW. As someone who feels devalued as a human if I don’t take at least 2 showers daily and obsess at all times about personal hygiene pleasant smells are very important.

    Harrumph! I will have you know I am always immaculately groomed – just ask our cherished Sheona, supplier of Frizz-Ease in bulk to discerning wolves. Link requested by OZ

    OZ

  12. I’d love to go to Mars – but I certainly could not cope with an 18 month journey. Send me to sleep and wake me up on arrival would seem to be the best way.

    I wish I could find something to ‘knock me out’ for the journey from here to the UK! I’d be quite happy to go to sleep at Brisbane airport and wake up in Heathrow!

  13. Evenin’ Boadicea. As you well know, you can’t do Brisbane/London in one hop, unfortunately, but I have a cunning plan born of years of experience. Get yourself to Singapore or Bangkok first, take several large tipples of your choice and THEN sleep all the way to Thiefrow.

    OZ
    . .

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