Once upon a time, a Prince asked a beautiful Princess, “Will you marry me?”
The Princess said, “No!!!”
And the Prince lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and banged skinny long-legged big-titted broads and hunted and fished and raced cars and went to naked bars and dated women half his age and drank whiskey, beer and Jack D and never heard bitching and never paid child support or alimony and banged cheerleaders and kept his house and guns and ate spam and potato chips and beans and blew enormous farts and never got cheated on while he was at work and all his friends and family thought he was frikin cool as hell and he had tons of money in the bank and left the toilet seat up.
The end.
Boadicea's Chariot 
A perfect life, except for the SKINNY broads, What is wrong with proper shaped ones? 🙂
Each to his own, FEEG.
Kate Middleton or Carol Vorderman. Your choice 🙂
I heard the Queen of Tonga made good lei.
Sounds like a Bilby character…
Would you mind rephrasing that, Nym? 😉
It sounds like the character wot Bilby wrote… (with apologies to Blby )
Only joshing, Nym. 🙂
Now I’ve got your attention, girls: what did the princess do after turning him down?
FEEG, Carol’s a bit brainy for our prince though, innit?
Initially she went into a deep depression, took to over eating and became grossly overweight. Then, after a brief but passionate lesbian affair she joined a feminista movement where she wrote long and with much vitriol about the worthlessness of men. She became a vegan, started wearing sandals and no longer shaved her legs or armpits. Eventually after years of poor diet, her teeth turned brown and her hair fell out. She finally died when she was run over by the prince at a Global Warming protest as he was racing his Bughatti Veyron up the hill at the Goodwood Festival of Speed.
As the Veyron was undamaged in the accident, the prince continued to live happily ever after.
🙂
FEEG, kate, Carol talks too much!
FEEG, you mean, Kate didn’t talk her way into Willie’s good books?
The beautiful princess was initially sad – about 5 minutes – then recalled the old saying about “fish” and “sea”. So she commissioned a large and luxurious yacht and invited whomever she fancied on cruises on it. When the magic wore off, the latest prince joined the fishes and had to learn to swim pretty quickly. And she lived happily ever after too, deciding where she would go, even if it didn’t have a golf course, and what she would eat and drink, even it that didn’t include beer.
🙂 🙂