Limerick Competition

Four gourmets in search of a treat
Went looking for somewhere to eat
While their tastes in wine
Coincided just fine
They couldn’t agree on the meat

One friend had objections to mutton
And as he unfastened a button
He said, ‘It’s for plebs
And those ghastly celebs.
Just eating it makes one a glutton’

The second had a loathing for beef
‘Bits always got stuck in my teeth.
It’s really not pleasant
And as I prefer pheasant,
Choosing that would be a relief’

The third said, ‘I do not like pork
I find that it tastes rather of chalk.
With crackling and apple
It’s less of a grapple
But tonight I am going to baulk.’

‘It certainly cannot be fish,’
Said the fourth man, announcing his wish
‘To that I’m allergic.
Don’t think me aspergic
But I insist on a different dish.’

In the end they sat down to venison.
At a table one could have played tennis on
They were served loin of deer
In a sauce made from beer
By waiters who quoted from Tennyson