The Business Plan

Betty sighed heavily. This gawky, nineteen-year-old with limp ginger hair and a pungent nylon parka was offering her a massage. It wasn’t easy running a valleys hairdressing business where people thought £8 for a shampoo and set was daylight robbery. Could the day get any worse?

Nigel’s sister Sian was a good little hairdresser; sassy and stylish and the elderly customers who still remembered the heady excitement of jitterbugging with GI’s in the Memorial Hall liked hearing what nights out with the girls were like these days.

Betty hadn’t believed it when Sian told her Nigel would ring her with a business proposition and now, looking at him standing there in her office, with acne capable of independent life and fingers fidgeting in his pockets, the prospect of him being able to give a massage, let alone a decent one, was about as unlikely as a Lionel Blair and a troupe of trained fruit bats tap-dancing their way across the Newport transporter bridge. Continue reading “The Business Plan”

“A few more hours, that’s all the time you’ve got …”

OK. These are the ones I have as of 8.40. Let me know if I’ve missed anyone :

Groucho (aka O Zangado): https://boadiceaschariot.wordpress.com/2010/07/24/10865/

Araminta: https://boadiceaschariot.wordpress.com/2010/08/08/the-royal-streaker/

Megadeth Royalist: https://boadiceaschariot.wordpress.com/2010/08/08/tidal-wave-august-creative-comp/

Pseu: https://boadiceaschariot.wordpress.com/2010/08/09/cupboard-love/

Mr. Mackie: https://boadiceaschariot.wordpress.com/2010/08/10/the-arab-bus-to-bethlehem-christmas-1981/

Bilby: https://boadiceaschariot.wordpress.com/2010/08/10/clones-a-very-short-story/

Janus: Comment #9 on https://boadiceaschariot.wordpress.com/2010/08/08/message-to-ferret-bilby-araminta-and-you-know-who-you-are/#comment-28699

Clones – A very short story

Annabel sat at her dressing table in her new underwear and stockings and artfully applied cosmetics to her face.  She was aiming for a natural look, which took some time to achieve. A sinfully expensive, cream silk frock lay waiting, draped across a chair, elegant, beautiful and sexy in an understated way.  She thought about which scent to wear and decided on something light and barely there. Certainly not her husband’s last rather pungent gift, which remained unused and privately labelled ‘Bats Guano’.

Continue reading “Clones – A very short story”

Sick Leave

I urgently needed a few days off work, but, I knew the Boss would not allow me to take leave.

I thought that maybe if I acted ‘Crazy’ then he would tell me to take a few days off.

So I hung upside-down on the ceiling and made funny noises.

My co-worker (who’s blonde) asked me what I was doing.

I told her that I was pretending to be a light bulb so that the Boss might think I was ‘Crazy’ and give me a few days off.

A few minutes later the Boss came into the office and asked, ‘What in the name of good GOD are you doing?’

I told him I was a light bulb.

He said, ‘You are clearly stressed out.’ Go home and recuperate for a couple of days.’

I jumped down and walked out of the office…

When my co-worker (the blonde) followed me, the Boss asked her, ‘..And where do you think you’re going?!’

(You’re going to love this….)

She said, ‘I’m going home, too. I can’t work in the dark.