Noddy goes to Westminster

The idea came to me when I saw that some Android software promoted by Google is to carry the name of that scion of York, KitKat. A bit like the Barclays Premier League, I s’pose. And I thought: what’s going to happen when the Heir Apparent, by now older and greyer in fact as well as ideas, eventually gets to wear the crown? What he needs is branding. (OK, I do mean with something hot but only metaphorically. Honest.)

So it will be the Enid Blyton Coronation, themed to the eyeballs with super-sized Noddy cars, smiling bobbies, Toytown buildings and naturally Big Ears starring as the new Mayor or whatever PC title he chooses to adopt.

Regrettably I don’t recall any female participants in the daily life of our two heroes – or even any horses – so the Duchess may have to take a back seat (but not literally, ‘cos there ain’t one) but what jolly fun it will be for the whole family, pretending they are cherished by so many people and living happily ever after.