I want to put it on record that I never had an affair with Audrey Hepburn (or even David Bowie). No, I have no idea where the rumours came from (if anywhere) but this denial is a necessary precursor to any sudden outburst of publicity about my private life. I might as well admit to having fancied Audrey something rotten. David Bowie on the other hand struck me (no, M’lud, not literally) as a man made for Jagger’s diverse attentions.
That’s cleared up then. Phew!
Boadicea's Chariot 
Have you announced this on Twitter, Janus?
Well, what a coincidence, I’ve never had an affair with Audrey Hepburn either. Spooky, eh?
What about Minnie Mouse?
OK, I believe you about Audrey Hepburn, but what about Jessica Rabbit?
Arrers, yes. I twat it. 🙂 Bravo, I knew you and I had a history together. Rick and FEEG, naeh …… I prefer the real thing.