December on the Death Star

I watched Robot Chicken Star Wars last night, that is some funny stuff right there. It reminded me of an old Xmas giggle I thought you might like.

Being a complete and utter Star Wars geek, I have taken the time to ‘shaggy dog’ it up a little, I make no apologies.

Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader are having a light sabre duel.

Darth gets the upper hand and with a flurry of blows, pushes Luke against a tractor beam control panel.

“You have learnt much young Skywalker, but you underestimate the power of the dark side. I know what you are going to get for Christmas!”

“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” cries Luke and with renewed vigour, pulls off a combination of swoops, slashes and lunges which have ol’ Darth staggering up against  a bank of droid terminals.

As sparks fly from the crossed beams, Darth tries again to put Luke off guard. “Search your feelings Luke. You know I speak the truth. I know what you are getting for Xmas.” The ruse works and Luke is distracted just long enough for Darth to force drag an Ion Drill across the room smashing into Luke’s ribs and sending him sprawling towards the carbonite freezer. As Darth strides purposefully, weapon held high ready to strike, he can’t resist a superior gloat.

“Absolute secrecy and amazing powers of triple wrapping are no match for the dark side of the force Luke. I know what you are getting.”

Summoning every ounce of strength in a desperate bid to stop the Dark Lord of the Sith from spilling the beans, Luke screams “NOOOO!” once again as he vaults up with a force leap, somersaulting high enough to land on the upper levels of the gantry above. Darth hurls his light sabre in a vicious arc towards the young jedi, controlling its path with the force. Luke parries and deflects the beam as it narrowly misses his head. The weapon slices through the steel support cables of the gantry and the structure collapses, dumping Luke to the floor of the freezing chamber.

Drawing his light sabre to his outstretched hand, Darth takes up an attacking stance over the stricken Luke. “You cannot escape your destiny my son, I am going to tell you what is waiting for you under the tree.”

Realising defeat is only seconds away, Luke struggles into a defensive crouch. “How can you possibly know? Not even the Emperor has the power to see past Leias triple strength, anti-force wrapping!”

Darth draws himself to his full and sinister height, pointing the deadly beam squarely at Luke, he exclaims triumphantly “Your faith in your friends will be your downfall Skywalker, you see…… I felt your presents.

I’ll get me cloak.

Merry Chrimbo Everyone!  🙂