Who was Jesus?

There were 3 good arguments that Jesus was Black:

1. He called everyone brother.

2. He liked Gospel.

3. He didn’t get a fair trial.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Jewish:

1. He went into His Father’s business.

2. He lived at home until he was 33.

3. He was sure his Mother was a virgin and his Mother was sure He was God.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Italian:

1. He talked with His hands.

2. He had wine with His meals.

3. He used olive oil.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was a Californian:

1. He never cut His hair.

2. He walked around barefoot all the time.

3. He started a new religion.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was an American Indian:

1. He was at peace with nature.

2. He ate a lot of fish.

3. He talked about the Great Spirit.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Irish:

1. He never got married..

2. He was always telling stories.

3. He loved green pastures.

But the most compelling evidence of all – 3 proofs that Jesus was a woman:

1. He fed a crowd at a moment’s notice when there was virtually no food.

2. He kept trying to get a message across to a bunch of men who just didn’t get it.

3. And even when He was dead, He had to get up because there was still work to do.

Can I get an AMEN now?!!

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Author: zenrules

64,MS,wheelchair,angry

4 thoughts on “Who was Jesus?”

  1. A fourth reason why we could prove that Jesus was a Jew, as told to me by a Jewish friend: who else but a Jew would come back to life several times to make a point?

  2. Abraham died and went to heaven where he met St. Peter at the gates.

    St. Peter welcomed him to heaven but Abraham who was a Muslim seemed to be to frantic and said to St. Peter

    “I need to find Mohammed!” So St. Peter sends him up one floor.

    When Abraham reached the second floor he was slightly out of breath when he saw the angel Gabriel and told him again he needed to find Mohammed

    So Gabriel told him again to go up a floor.

    At this point he is thinking to himself “wow Mohammed is more important than St. Peter and the angel Gabriel. When he gets to the third floor he sees Jesus and asks him very out of breath. “Mohammed! I need to see Mohammed!”

    so Jesus tells him “Go up one floor my friend”

    So…. Abraham is struggling up the flight of stairs when he thinks to himself again “wow he’s even more important than Jesus”

    When he reaches the next floor he sees a man with a long white beard and realizes it’s God. God sees that Abraham is extremely out of breath and asks him “would you like a coffee?”

    Abraham is frustrated and says ” No i just want to find Mohammed!”. God tells him “Yes, you will but please rest .”

    Abraham agrees to have a coffee with God. God is happy that Abraham has accepted and calls out…

    “Mohammed!!!! … 2 coffees.”

    🙂

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