24 thoughts on “Thanks Donald!”

  1. No problemo, Also I must apologize, truth is I have lived most of my life on the wrong side of of the good stuff, what most normal people would consider in bad taste I see only as funny, what most would consider as horrid was most likely made so by me; and the stuff that normal people are scared of, is usually my aphrodisiac.

    Comes from being born and raised in the badlands of Uruguay then “transported” to Australia where I was thought how to survive in a rather unorthodox fashion by the army who loved me because they never had to teach me much.

    I’m almost back to normal now, another 30 years and I’ll be right as rain 🙂

    So don’t hesitate to delete my posts, I won’t mind.

  2. No apologies needed or required.

    You seem to understand what many do not – that what is acceptable in some places is not appropriate in others…Would that a few others were less sensitive about my comments!

    It occurs to me that I know absolutely nothing about Uruguay – how about enlightening me?

    🙂

  3. Uruguay? A beautiful country if you are British because we love them, Americans get knocked off pretty quickly though, no jobs, no future, but 98% literacy and the best education system in the world.

    Regardless of the fact that they have no money, they have everything … cars, TV, phones, Free Medical, all the roads made of concrete, all the taxis are Mercedes Benz and on and on.

    Montevideo, the capital and where I was born is as European as any city in France, England or even Italy, the entire coastline on the Atlantic ocean has a huge sea-barrier some 100 meters high to stop the regular sea-quakes that hit the area, they break the tsunamis and turn the wave into a foam that envelops most of the city, but we don’t get the shakes (Japan could learn a thing or two here) 🙂

    Nearly everybody speaks at least 3 languages, most speak English.

    But that was then!

    Today the place is riddled with communism, poverty, lack of opportunities and the ever present threat that America might send its special forces against us.

    But still, for the British and even the Jews, it is the best place to visit in South America because they get treated like gold.

  4. A bit more?

    The country is as flat as the head on a tack, there is only the one big hill in Montevideo and a few odd small mountains in the interior, and in spring everything turns violet because of the flowers that grow wild all over the place. No deadly fauna except for a very rare golden snake that even zoos can’t get their hands on.

    Education used to be free all the way to University but I don’t know what that would be like now, medicine also used to be free, again, now I don’t know.

    I hear the people are very unhappy and I would love to go back and help them make a new revolution to gain their proper democratic freedom but …..

    I’m a dead man if I ever go back, even though I was a kid when they took me out of there, the communists and the socialists have a thing about my family. 🙂

  5. Hello Zen, more?

    Uruguay is a fantastic place to grow up in, my brother and I grew up in complete freedom, my dad was a engineer in the merchant navy who had quit to marry my mother who until we left the country was the secretary to the minister for the interior, a much feared man.

    We were a very religious family, I am the only one who still practices the religion, look at the names of all my brothers and sisters.

    Pedro – for St. Peter
    Miguel Angel – for the angel that fights Satan in Heaven
    Elizabeth – sister of the Virgin Mary
    Denis – for the man who sinned in the revelation chapters
    Donald – That’s me, you have to work that one out for yourself
    David – who beat Goliath
    Mary – yeah, the virgin
    Miriam – another one from the Bible

    My mother’s name is Milka
    And my father’s name we are not allowed to mention even though he’s been dead some 40 years.

    Denis and I are also named after two British friends of my father.

    We were filthy rich in Uruguay although we had little money, my dad was into the black market and stuff like that plus he had his job in the harbour.

    I had a maid to “fiddle with” until I was 13 years old 🙂

    In fact everybody there is into the black market, mostly stuff taken as “tax” from the American ships that come into the harbour, over there it is not unusual to rob them blind.

    The people there are really well educated, unfortunately they are very political in their discussions, mostly stuff against America – the hated enemy of the continent.

    The children there have a choice in schooling, 4 hours a day, Monday to Saturday, either 8:00 am to 12:00 midday or 2:00 Pm to 6:00 Pm, we went to afternoon school so we had all day to ourselves to play, wander around or cause mayhem, in my days we were all armed with one weapon or another.

    Christmas were great, you have no idea what a South American Christmas is like, dancing, wine, rumba, conga, cumbia

    Then there is the Carnivals, they go on for months and people dance on the streets every single day until they are over. My dad used to go dancing for three days straight until he dropped then somebody would always bring him home. he didn’t drink but many Uruguayans drink either wine or grapa. Mind you, until I was 22 there were few men who could drink like I did, I had my first taste at 8 years of age, Gin, got drunk as a skunk 🙂

    It was a great country until America, in its fight against Russia decided to send its chief torturer to Uruguay, he started kidnapping homeless men off the streets so he could use them to train our corrupt police officers on how to torture our citizens. They killed hundreds of our people then they started doing the same to women.

    The people complained but to no avail so in my suburb “La Teja” we formed the Tupamaro movement, I was only a kid at the time so at first I wasn’t allowed to do much, just lookout most of the time or runner/messenger.

    I killed my first man just before I turned 10, I won’t say how but as you can imagine, kids can be very cruel.

    The Tupamaro movement became the most prolific and efficient “terrorist” movement in the world (that’s what America called us) and many of our people went to train in both Russia and Cuba, but half of us were democrats and times were hard but we all had to stay together to fight for the country.

    We kidnapped everybody that was important, fattened them up and them set them free after asking for ransoms so we could buy guns for the struggle, we fattened them up so the people could see that we weren’t really terrorists but freedom fighters.

    When we first got started we did what at the time was the world’s biggest bank robbery, the money was used to fund the movement although today I’m sure somebody pocket much of it.

    We even had plans to go to America and kill their president and many of their politicians, it was infallible because we were planning to go in as a delegation representing the politicians who were against us, but we never made it there at the time.

    Then something funny happened.

    Dan Mitrione, the American torturer returned to Uruguay after some time away and we kidnapped him, in his possession we found all sorts of proof of how America was the real villain behind all the problems in South America, how it was them that set off bombs and kidnapped everybody and executed people and corrupted politicians and so on.

    And they have followed the same procedure all over the world ever since.

    Mr Mitrione had been shot in the shoulder during the kidnapping and he was well looked after, then he was interrogated ( on 8mm video) and then we shot him twice in the head and dumped him in the street. I saw that. It was good to put the bastard out of his misery, In America they called him a murdered hero and gave him a state funeral but he was just a sadistic killer.

    At his funeral in America some of our members turned up and offered the film and copies of the documents to one and all ….. we stuffed them but good 🙂

    His killing was in late 1969 but all reports that I’ve read so far say it happened sometime after 1970, some even say 1973, I have no idea why this is so but I know it was late 69.

    The film caused all sorts of political mayhem in America, WE HAD PROOF that they were truly corrupt and evil and they didn’t like this one bit.

    They sent their special forces and begun killing every single member of the movement, one at a time, usually by kicking their doors down in the middle of the night and killing them in bed, even their children.

    They even bought out the government and made them give up power to the military with the express orders to kill the lot of us; No kidding, this happened.

    The film is still somewhere in South America.

    We lost an uncle and two cousins in one single week, my father got a warning that we were on the list and that we had a choice, leave or die, we wanted to stay and fight to the death but mum and dad said that we’d done enough and we left for Australia.

    The funniest thing is that we went via AMERICA, the mongrels were looking for us and we even had a holiday in Los Angeles, went to Disneyland 🙂

    Most of the Tupamaros were murdered by the Americans, some 3000 of them, some were captured (the communists) and they spent many years in jail

    Who helped us get out? The British!!! Shoosh 🙂

    All the free communists Tupamaros went to Cuba or Venezuela, a few of them came over here as well.

    Later on the Tupamaros came back, went political and won the elections, they rule Uruguay to this day. George Bush gave them millions to stay democratic but they chose to go socialist and stuffed the country even more.

    And that’s why I can’t go back, if I do then I would do the whole thing all over again, but since I don’t fight for communism or socialism and since the people elected a socialist regime, I won’t help them until they at least try to return to democracy.

    So I been told, go back and I’m dead, the closest I managed to get was Argentina to see my oldest brother, but even then I was first interrogated by Argentinian military officers who were afraid I would try to sneak into Uruguay across the river.

  6. PS : David, Mary and Miriam died when they were little, my brother Denis and I are only 11 months apart so we grew up together but the other 3 were much older and we rarely saw them.

  7. Dunno what Boadicea is thanking you for chum, but thanks for this lot.

    Montevideo was the diversion airfield when the Falklands was a no go. I nearly went there one time. The Herc pilot was a gung-ho beggar and had one bash at landing on the islands before diverting. We were on finals in a 45 knot crosswind, when the wind suddenly gusted in another direction. We were all thrown up into our seat straps. When lift returned we were then dumped hard into our seats, it smarted a bit. 30 seconds later there was a tremendous thump and we heard the props being thrown into full reverse thrust. No one was happy, we were back on terra firma at Mount Pleasant Airfield and not a jolly to Monte Vid.

    It was only in the bar later that the loadmaster told us we fell 150 feet in the gust, another few seconds and we would have smashed into the ground short of the runway.

  8. Ferret – Did yous have a visa to land on “Argentinian Soil”? 🙂

    By the way; Hercs are known to drop a few feet from time to time but have you ever flown in a Caribou? Those things would drop 500 feet without warning! I not only hated those things, I feared them with a passion.

  9. Chris – Argentinians love to tell the world that Uruguay is only a suburb of Argentina. Uruguayans just laugh at them, drive across the bridge, pay 50 cents to have sex with their women in Buenos Aires and then come back home to Montevideo to talk about how cheap they all are. 🙂

    Buenos Aires, by the way, is one of the dirtiest cities in the world.

  10. Donald: Argentina is a country I want to like, but somehow can’t. It reminds me too much of China in some ways. “That bit of land is ours, even if they rule it themselves. Oh, and that bit of land is ours, too, even though it is occupied by someone else. This really hurts our feelings” Blah blah blah blah blah. At least when the Americans pulled out of the Philippines and Cuba (Castro helped a bit there) they didn’t talk about it rightfully belonging to the USA.

  11. Actually, Uruguay and Argentina are brother-nations, there is little ill feelings between them except for some politico/commercial arguments regarding pulp mills along the Uruguay side of the river.

    They put Uruguay down as much as possible and Uruguay does the same to them but it is the same kind of relationship as that of Australia and New Zealand.

    They are a very happy people, many are so poor they have no shoes and walk the streets or work in bare feet, just like in Uruguay, but for some reason money doesn’t mean the same there as it does in the west.

    They only have two problems …

    One – They are a socialist nation which has no cure, why? “CHE GUEVARRA”

    Two – They are, without doubt, one of the most arrogant nations on Earth.

    And yes, Argentina is Uruguayan territory, we helped them gain their freedom but run away as soon as possible when they started saying their Tango was better than ours because …..

    We know Carlos Gardel was Uruguayan 🙂

    Did you know they did not allow Google maps to see Argentinian territory too close, also did you know they have a nuclear reactor and one day they will most likely be the first in South America to have the bomb?

    I pity the Falklands because they will never give up on it and if they should ever get the bomb they will most definitely nuke the place in order to re-gain it .

    Personally I don’t give a hoot about the islands, I just love the stir I get out of it but I can assure that Britain will one day have grief over it … Just like Uruguayans, the Argentinians are stubborn and never quit on their dreams but … unlike Uruguayans, the Argentinians have a cowardly streak to them and they’ll get you when you are looking the other way.

    There is far too much Spanish blood in them and not enough Indio blood 😦

  12. Donald: I am well aware of that. Uruguay was the creation of the British who had to intervene to prevent Argentina and Brazil from killing each other over the land. “Now, children, if you will not stop fighting over this toy, neither one of you will get it!”.

    The Falklands are like Gibraltar. It’s a pebble in the shoe, a pin poking at the national ego, but something not worth the fight. They are ignored unless the government is in trouble and wishes to score points on pure and unadulterated nationalism. It would also be unwise for them to retake it as they would lose their favourite distraction and might have to actually accomplish something.

  13. Ah, but did you know that the Falklands is one of the most important strategic islands in the world? He who controls the islands also controls the entire South Atlantic passage of all ships into the Magellan straits and the main route to the Pacific Ocean. Therein lies its importance.

    The Argentinians know this and they are after the power it would give them, not just the Island’s casino! 🙂

  14. Donald: considering how well the manage their economy and what land they have, nothing would change. I propose a referendum on the issue. Or giving it to Brazil.

  15. Give it to Australia. Then we could use it to replace Nauru and have an Atlantic Solution, rather than a Pacific one. 😀

    Please note – this comment will be understood by Donald and Christopher; if you don’t understand, just ignore it.

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