Roast turkey !
Go on, let’s hear all those terrible jokes you had in the works dinner Christmas crackers…..
What bird has wings but cannot fly ?
Roast turkey !
Go on, let’s hear all those terrible jokes you had in the works dinner Christmas crackers…..
Boadicea's Chariot 
Q: What goes up when it is coming down? A: An umbrella 😦
Two snowmen in a front garden. One turns to the other and says..
“Hey! Can you smell carrots?”
In answer to the post,
Emu
Ostrich
Chicken
Rhea
Penguin
Kiwi
and…
a dead sparrow
Not from a cracker, not even christmassy, a giggle nevertheless 😉
According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington was recently faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick, they would press their lips on the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints. Every night the maintenance man would remove them, and the next day the girls would put them back. Finally the principal decided that something had to be done.
She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night (you can just imagine all the yawns from the little princesses).
To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required. He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it.
Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.
There are teachers . . . and then there are educators.
What sits at the bottom of the sea and shivers?
A nervous wreck.
Come on there must be more….
(I like that one Soutie!)
What’s the nearest thing to Silver?
Go on….
What happens if you eat the Christmas decorations ?
You get tinsel-itus !
The lone rangers nuts
Thank you OMG!
What happened when the snowgirl fell out with the snowboy ?
She cut of his snowballs
As you can see my family REALLY look forward to my humour around the festive table.
My answer was somewhat different.
She gave him a cold shoulder.
But yours is better.
Ferret you missed a cassowary
The cassowary (genus Casuarius) is a very large flightless bird native to the tropical forests of New Guinea, nearby islands and northeastern Australia.[2]
The Southern Cassowary is the third tallest and second heaviest living bird, smaller only than the ostrich and emu.
Cassowaries feed mainly on fruits, though all species are truly omnivorous and will take a range of other plant food including shoots, grass seeds, and fungi in addition to invertebrates and small vertebrates. (thank you Wiki)